


Visits

by lilsherlockian1975



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Boggarts, Childhood Trauma, Dark Comedy, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Friendship, HEA, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Humor, Mentions of Attempted Suicide, Occlumency, Psychological stuffs, Romance, Very brief mention of rape (not to the main characters)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-12 23:26:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 22,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14737814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilsherlockian1975/pseuds/lilsherlockian1975
Summary: After a visit from Minerva, Hermione embarks on a bit of reconnaissance to find out what is going on with her former Potions professor. Things are not as they should be and the young witch is determined to 'fix' the wizard... by any means necessary. EWE. Happy ending promised."What did you tell Hermione Granger?!" he demanded."Oh, I'm fine, other than some aching joints, but that's to be expected at my age, I suppose. Thanks for asking and you?""I'm in no mood," he hissed as he paced. "That witch isn't afraid of me. Not in the least. So you must have…" The moment it dawned on him he felt like the world's biggest fool. How had he not seen it?The book. The Dark Arts book. She knows."How could you, Minerva?" Granger knew about his will and the witch in front of him had told her. Gods... He felt humiliated.She didn't even have the decency to appear ashamed. "I needed to know why, Severus."





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [OracleObscured](https://archiveofourown.org/users/OracleObscured/gifts).



> Warning: This is a dark comedy and has lots of talk of suicide. I am NOT, I repeat NOT making light of the topic. It is just a story and meant to be enjoyed as such. If suicide is a trigger for you, if it causes you any kind of discomfort for any reason, please do not read this story. It is meant to entertain and bring joy, not cause distress! There is more going on in Severus' case than meets the eye and we will find out as the story progresses. But please understand that I do take depression and suicidal thoughts quite seriously. There is also very brief mention of rape in a later chapter (that does not happen to either of the main characters).
> 
> Please note: *After I started this story, someone very close to me killed themselves. I had to take a little break and put it aside for a while before finishing it. I believe, however, that I understand certain aspects of this story better now and I hope it comes through in my writing.*
> 
> I'm gifting this story to Oracle Obscured because her fics have brought me hours of joy and inspiration. I hope you enjoy this, OO!
> 
> Huge thanks to Darnedchild for her beta/Harry Potter picking, Elizabeth K1 for betaing and MrsMCrieff for her Britt work. Such wonderful friends I have. All errors belong to me, please keep that in mind.
> 
> I own nothing. Enjoy ~Lil~

**Minerva McGonagall**

After the tea was poured and the biscuits doled out, Hermione sat back and appraised her mentor very closely. Something was bothering the witch, it was quite obvious. This was  _not_ a social visit.

"Minerva…" Hermione started, but didn't get to finish; the look on the woman's face stopped her cold.

Setting her teacup down on the coffee table, Minerva drew a deep breath before speaking. "Severus Snape tried to kill himself last week."

Somehow, Hermione held in her gasp. It wasn't exactly surprising, but it was unnerving. The wizard had been through such an ordeal, had done so much for them all. To feel so hopeless as to… "How? How did he…?"

The corner of Minerva's lips curled in what could have been the start of a smile. Odd, given the topic of conversation. "It was all strangely dramatic, for Severus that is. Of course, he can be quite melodramatic when he wants to be. I remember Albus once saying..."

"Minerva, please!" Hermione scolded, bringing the witch back to the grave conversation.

"Ah, yes." She looked properly abashed. "Well, his out of character behaviour  _did_  alert us so, I suppose I should be grateful."

"What did he do?"

"Kingsley and I have been keeping an eye on him. He was not at  _all_ pleased when he woke to find himself… alive."

"He didn't plan on surviving...?"

"No, evidently not. The Minister and I had our suspicions about Severus' mental state. Kingsley wanted him to see a therapist: a Squib who deals in this sort of thing and has worked with several war survivors." She paused. "Severus refused, of course. About three weeks ago, Kingsley Flooed me. It seemed that Severus had started moving all of his books and potions equipment to Gringotts, to his vault. He also visited a solicitor."

"The Minister was having Professor Snape followed?"

"Indeed. We were  _that_ concerned, Hermione. He had an Auror detail," Minerva explained.

She could just imagine how well that went over with her former professor. The man was so private. She cringed, remembering how his personal life had been portrayed in front of the whole Wizarding world during his trial. "Surely he was aware of it; the man was a spy for seventeen years."

"Oh, yes. He managed to lose his detail eight times in ten days. In the end, I believe his goal became more important than his concern for being watched. He stopped trying to elude them and went about his business." The Headmistress paused and took a prim sip of tea. "He must have thought his plans solid enough to surpass any Ministry trained Auror because they certainly didn't stop him from…" She paused again, swallowing and looking down at her lap.

"What, Minerva? What did he do?"

Her mentor's eyes came back up to meet hers. "He blew up his house, Hermione. He blew it up whilst inside it."

This time she did gasp.

"It explains why he moved his books. He simply couldn't destroy them." The witch suddenly looked ten years older. "I know you don't know him very well… At least I didn't think…" She was looking down at the rug, confusion written on her face.

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.

With a shake of her head, she said, "Well, Severus, he is methodical…"

That was unsurprising in the extreme. It was one thing she  _did_ know about the man.

"He is exacting and precise. And when planning his death, he took care of  _every_ last detail."

"Such as?"

"Casting a protective and stable magical barrier around the area so that the explosion would not damage other buildings and the fire wouldn't spread." Giving Hermione a knowing look, she added, "Even after he died."

That kind of magic was beyond her, far beyond her knowledge and ability. The amount of expertise that wizard held was astonishing. Hermione felt anger rage through her at the thought of losing that knowledge. He had, selfishly, tried to throw it away.

"He had also written up a will. And that brings me to the reason for my visit."

Anger was suddenly replaced by unease. What could Severus Snape's will possibly have to do with her?

"He left his gold to the orphan's fund. Understandable. Severus' guilt is palpable and something which he may never get over. He left some of his more unique potions equipment to Draco Malfoy. Again, unsurprising. Draco is his godson, after all."

Hermione wasn't aware of this fact, but it did make sense.

"He even left Harry something," Minerva said with a sad smile.

"Really?" She was more than a bit shocked.

"Yes. Severus had removed all of his memories of Lily and left them to Mr. Potter."

"Oh, my God!"

"He does nothing by halves, that man," Minerva said fondly, then looked away dabbing the corner of her eye. After a moment of composing herself, she turned back to Hermione. "His books, however, he left to you."

" _He what?"_  she asked in a shocked whisper.

"It is the most impressive private collection I have ever seen, other than Albus', of course. Do you know why he would do that, Hermione?" the older witch asked, not disguising her confusion. Confusion that Hermione shared, in fact.

"I have no idea," she admitted.

"His will was  _very_  specific. You were to get  _all_ of his books, manuscripts and journals. Even his private writings."

"No explanation?" Hermione asked.

"None."

She was gobsmacked. Minerva must have noticed.

With a sigh, the witch said, "I see that I will get no answers to this mystery from you. I had hoped…" she trailed off, clearly disappointed.

But Hermione  _had_ no answers. It made absolutely no sense. The man hated her, truly hated her. He found her to be an obnoxious, hand-waving, know-it-all. An insufferable Gryffindor. A Muggle-born suck-up. He had begrudgingly given her the lowest marks he could possibly give on her near perfect papers. He had always complained about their length -  _Once again, Miss Granger, you seem to think that 'six inches' means something different for you than it does for the rest of the class. If I had wanted over a foot of parchment on the uses of valerian root, I would have asked for it._  And if that wasn't bad enough, he also attacked her supposed lack of originality -  _Your mark would have been higher if the assignment had been to parrot back everything you've ever read about Forgetfulness Potion, Miss Granger. However, it was not! At some point in your life, you will be forced to use your own mind and not rely solely on books to find every answer!_

Forcing herself back to the moment at hand, she asked the Headmistress how he survived what had obviously been a well-planned suicide attempt.

"Fortunately for Severus, for us all really, his Auror detail was a headstrong Gryffindor that day. The wizard rushed in, after casting a strong Flame-Freezing Charm, and managed to get his unconscious body to safety," she explained. "Severus escaped with a broken femur and a nasty concussion."

"No burns?"

"A few. Nothing that the Healers couldn't deal with. Not even any scars. No new ones, anyway," she added.

"Can I ask who the Auror was?"

**Ronald Weasley**

She had her arms around his neck before he knew what was going on.

"Hey, 'Mione!" he said, returning her embrace. "Not that I don't enjoy your hugs, luv, but what's the occasion?"

Pulling back, she took his face in her hands. "You're a hero, Ron!"

His cheeks pinked, all of his freckles actually turning an adorable shade of bright red in the process as a sideways smile formed on his lips. "Ah, you mean Snape, right? How'd you find out? That's supposed to be confidential."

She rose up on her tiptoes and kissed his heated cheek. "Minerva visited," she explained as she took off her jacket and sat down at the kitchen table.

He had been, as she had expected, at Grimmauld Place. He and Harry were living there: flat-sharing, as it were, trying to make it a regular bachelor's pad. They had asked her to move in with them, but after her and Ron's failed attempt at a relationship, Hermione didn't think that was a good idea.

"You saved his life, Ronald!"

He sat down next to her, looking bashful, and waved a dismissive hand. "I was doing my job."

"Doesn't mean I'm not proud." And she was. Not only of what he had done for their former (and most hated) professor, but of who Ron had become. He really could have become a fame-seeking prat, if he hadn't been more careful but instead, Ronald had matured. That was obvious in his attitude towards Professor Snape if nothing else. It was a real shame that there was absolutely no spark between the two of them. She did love him dearly… just not like  _that_.

Again, he tried to blow her off, but Hermione would allow it. "Tell me what happened." She knew he couldn't resist telling a story.

"Well, we all knew he was up to something, that much was obvious. Kingsley himself had picked out four of us to watch him…"

"Was Harry one of them?"

"No. Kings said he was too close. Too emotionally attached."

She was secretly glad for the Minister's consideration. Harry still had a ton of unresolved feelings about Snape and his mum. "But not you?"

"Evidently not. Anyway, we'd been using this abandoned house across the street as a sort of base camp. There's loads of 'em in that neighbourhood. Merlin, 'Mione, if I'd grown up there… I don't know… I'd be depressed too. So, I'd been with him for about four hours that day and the only time I'd seen him was when he'd come out and put up some sort of ward around his house. I used Harry's cloak - I'd asked him for it when we started surveilling Snape - and I went to get a closer look at the ward when he went back inside." He leant closer. "It wasn't a ward, not really. I didn't recognise it. It wasn't anything like the ones you used in the Forest of Dean or like we were taught in training. It felt more like a… physical wall."

That was interesting. Hermione instantly wanted to learn more, but she suppressed her urge to ask questions.

"I just knew he was about to do something, Hermione. So I went across the street and sent my Patronus to the rest of the squad in the MLE for back-up and then went back to the house, well, as close as I could get with that wall thing. I didn't want him to detect me. Not two minutes later there was this awful explosion. The wall held it in though."

"How'd you get through?"

"That was the strangest part, 'Mione. I got in easily. The investigators said that his barrier must have let in air, and me, in order to feed the flames but kept anything from escaping. I found Snape unconscious and tried to leave, but couldn't, of course. I cast a Flame-Freezing Charm, as strong as I could and looked around for an exit. His Floo was still intact, somehow. The Floo powder was scattered all over the floor, so I put him down and gathered up what I could, picked him back up and tossed it in."

Good Lord! It was even more exciting than she'd expected. "Where'd you end up?"

His cheeks turned a deep red this time. "Ah, well, um..."

"Ronald, what happened next? Where'd you land?"

"Well, a brothel, I suppose." He laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Ah, we fell through their Floo - their main Floo, not into one of the, um, business rooms - and when I looked up we had six wands pointed at us."

Hermione resisted her urge to laugh. Clearly, poor Ron was uncomfortable with being in the presence of all those 'business women'.

Looking down, he continued his story, "Anyway, I started explaining what had happened and one of the, ah, girls - ladies - was really smart, not smart like you smart, but… ya know. Anyway, she started checking old Snape for injuries." His eyes met hers. "She was amazing, 'Mione! She set his leg and stabilised him while one of the other… ladies got me some more powder."

"What's her name, Ron?" Hermione asked, a knowing smile on her face.

"Wh-what?"

"Her name?"

"Callista."

"And…"

"She's three years older than us. She left school right after You-Know-Who came back. Her parents were killed and she had to take care of her little sister. A Squib." His words sort of poured out of him, not unlike verbal diarrhea. "She wanted to be a Healer, ya see, but things happened, obviously. She's sweet and kind and pretty and smart…"

"Ron!" Hermione stopped him, grabbing his hands. "You don't have to defend her, or yourself, if that's what you're trying to do." She squeezed his wrist. "You like her?"

"Yeah, I guess. I never was good at hiding things from you, 'Mione."

"How many times have you seen her?"

"Three," he answered, but rushed on, adding, "Never like that, though. Just to… talk."

 _Oh, Ron,_  she thought.  _You're still such a boy sometimes._  "Are you going to see her again?"

"Yeah, suppose. Not sure how mum'll take it if…" he trailed off.

"Don't worry about that right now," she said. "What you did was amazing."

He smiled proudly then asked, "Is Snape okay? I talked to Kingsley a couple days ago…"

"Yes, he seems to be. At least according to Minerva. He's home now, I guess. Well, not  _his_ home, obviously."

"That's good. I mean, he's a git and all, but…"

Hermione squeezed his hand. "You did a wonderful thing, Ron." She knew why he cared, why he had matured so quickly about certain things. "How  _is_ George?"

He looked at her, his eyes sad and watery. "Mum's watching him close. Angelina's staying at the Burrow now, too."

The surviving twin hadn't tried to hurt himself, yet, but he had stopped living in a way. In the two-plus years since the end of the war, since Fred's death, George had barely existed. The shop was closed at the moment. Everyone spent their time watching him closely, hoping that he'd suddenly play a prank, make a joke. He hadn't yet.

"He's, um, seeing this Squib. A, ah, kind of talking Healer."

"A therapist?"

"Yeah, that's it. Yesterday was his first visit."

"That's good. That's what he needs."

"What about Snape? Shouldn't he talk to the therapist?"

"Maybe, Ron," she said with a nod. "I'm looking into a couple of things."

"'Course you are, 'Mione." He winked. "Always looking out for people, aren't you?"

 **Hermione Granger - Visit** **#1**

The house was too bright, too 'homey' for his taste. Of course, he shouldn't complain (even though he did), he  _had_ blown his own home up, after all. He tried to get comfortable in the oversized, overstuffed armchair, but simply couldn't. It was nothing like his high backed wing chair that was now a pile of ash on a deserted street in Cokeworth. Transfiguration was an option, but that wasn't exactly one of his specialties. Frankly, he was pants at it.

Minerva had insisted he stay at one of the 'family cottages' in Hogsmeade that the school owned and rarely used. He wasn't a fool! He knew she wanted him close to keep an 'eye' on him. Fine! He'd play along… for now.

He cursed Kingsley  _bloody_ Shacklebolt and Minerva  _bloody_ McGonagall for thwarting his careful plans. Worst of all, no one would tell him the identity of the Auror who had saved his life. He could plot and plan against Winky for saving him at the Shack (even if he would never do anything about it - he couldn't actually harm the crazy little elf!) but if he didn't know  _who_ had pulled him from his burning home, he couldn't exact his revenge.

It didn't matter. His ultimate revenge was being planned on himself anyway. He'd have to wait, unfortunately. Getting Minerva and Kings off of his back was more important at the moment. It would take time, but time was the one thing that Severus Snape had in spades.

A soft knock on the door of the cottage brought him out of his brooding. He considered not answering, but to avoid all contact would only invite more pestering from the meddling duo. Rising with a groan, he glided to the foyer and jerked the door opened.

Who he found shocked him to his core.

"Miss Granger," he said, disdain dripping from his voice as he quickly schooled his reaction. "They've enlisted help, I see." He didn't move to invite her in. He had only allowed Kingsley in once and Minerva twice in the month since he had moved in. All three occasions were mistakes, moments of weakness. Loneliness was a bitch.

"Hello, Professor. May I come…"

"No. You may not. As you can see, I am alive, if not well. You can make your report to the Minister or Headmistress, whoever put you up to this, and know that you are  _not_ welcomed back." He started to shut the door, but she held up a hand, stopping him with a flick of her wrist and a bit of wandless magic. She was an impressive witch, always had been, even if he had never been able to admit it. He was so taken aback, that he didn't react quick enough to stop her before she took one step forward and spoke.

"I'm not here on orders, sir. They don't even know about my visit. Actually…" She reached into the pocket of her robes and pulled out a book. "I found this in a shop in Provence whilst I was investigating a…" She smiled, tucked her head and smoothed down her skirt. She was dressed entirely in wizarding fashions. Which surprised him, for some reason. "Sorry, I can't tell you what I was…"

"You are an Unspeakable, Miss Granger. You should be more careful."

"I can neither confirm nor deny…"

"Of course you are. What else would you do at the Ministry? Nothing there could possibly hold your interest long enough."

"At any rate, this book…" She held it out to him.

He looked down and read the title.  _Lesser Known Dark Curses and Counter Curses of the Late Eleventh and Early Twelfth Centuries._  Extremely obscure and, unbelievably, he did not own it. "What about it?"

"I thought…"

His snort of laughter cut her off. Crossing his arms over his chest, he said, "Give me a moment to contain my surprise at the fact that  _the Great Hermione Granger_  had a… thought?"

Somehow, she held onto her composure.  _I've completely lost my touch,_  he grumbled in his head as he watched her face for signs of annoyance or anger and found none.

"I thought you might enjoy it, sir." She shook the book at him expectedly. It was the only indication he received that she had lost any patience whatsoever.

Severus realised that he had no choice. The only way he would get rid of the chit was to accept her little offering! Taking the book with an exaggerated sigh, he held it at his side without looking at it. "Happy?"

"Immeasurably," she replied, a small smile playing on her glossy lips. Retreating back across the threshold, she nodded. "Have a wonderful day, Professor." Then she turned and left.

"Insolent little twit!" he said as he shut his door.

Sitting back down in the far too comfortable chair, he opened the book and found an inscription.

_Professor Snape,_

_There are many things that are 'lesser known' in this world. I hope you find this book as fascinating I did. And I also hope that you take a moment to consider that there are still many unknown variables to discover._

_Hermione J. Granger_

He harrumphed as he turned the page and started reading.

**Hermione Granger - Visit #2**

There was something to be said for depression. Sleep for one thing. He found that he was sleeping more than ever before. At least he wasn't having nightmares, for some unknown reason. He kept expecting them, but they never came. It was almost disturbing. Oh, he dreamed (some very interesting dreams of late), but he was never plagued with unsettling images of the Dark Lord or Albus or even Lily. Glutton for punishment that he was, he had searched his books upon returning to Spinner's End, but found nothing to explain the sudden absence of near lifelong night terrors, save one. And that was simply impossible. So he brushed it off as a side effect of the many potions he'd been fed, or perhaps of the venom itself. He could research it if he cared to, but he had more important things to do. Such as his death.

After a leisurely lie-in on a Saturday morning, Severus got up and made himself tea and toast. He couldn't be arsed to put too much effort into breakfast at ten in the morning. Neither could he be bothered to get dressed in his full 'bat of the dungeons' regalia, opting for dark jeans and a long-sleeved black tee-shirt instead. He wouldn't have bought the clothes himself, but Kingsley had sent him a whole new wardrobe after he'd destroyed his, half of it Muggle. Though he would never admit it out loud, it  _was_  quite comfortable. And he did enjoy the ease of it. While he had once needed the multitude of buttons, high collars and cuffs (that covered most of his hands) to armour himself against the world, alone in his little cottage that was quite unnecessary. Soft cotton was all the armament he needed.

His plans were somewhat on hold at the moment. Kingsley was  _not_ giving up and neither was Minerva. And if he was going to kill himself, he would do it  _his_ way, without their intervention. He had the potions ingredients, of course. He could brew a strong enough poison to get the job done. He had found the exact potion that would kill him instantly, painlessly. But every time he attempted it, they would show up, asking questions and poking around his cauldrons. Thus leading him to believe that the house was somehow warded to alert them.

_Meddling busybodies!_

Why wasn't he allowed this? Why couldn't he go out on his own terms?

A Potions master who wasn't even allowed to brew his own death!  _Absurd!_

He could simply open his wrists!  _What could they do about that_? he wondered. Nothing, of course! He'd bleed out before one of Kingsley's Aurors could rush to the rescue. However, Severus did  _not_ like… knives. Bellatrix had put him off of them. The witch was the single most sadistic cunt he'd ever had the displeasure of knowing. Years spent having to watch her derive almost sexual pleasure out of slicing up prisoners in his presence had left him leery of a blade, at least when close to human skin.

He just didn't think he could stand to watch his blood leaving his body, slowly and painfully.

And then there was his uncooperative wand! The bloody thing  _would not kill him!_  He had tried, back in Spinner's End, to cast an Avada on himself. It didn't work. He had heard, had read, that it was nigh impossible to kill oneself with one's own wand, but he had to try.

He was just desperate enough to find a bit of rope and…

 _NO!_  He would die with some measure of dignity, damnit!

It would all be a moot point if he had just died like he was supposed to!

_Bloody house-elves!_

Finishing his tea, he was walking into the front room when a knock sounded on the front door.  _Not again!_  Minerva had just been there the day before!

Only it wasn't Minerva.

He sneered but said nothing as he opened the door keeping a firm grasp on the aged wood (and his magic), this time as to  _not_  let her get the drop on him.

"'Morning, Professor!" she said brightly.

"You have another book for me, Miss Granger?" he asked, his tone as bored as he could possibly make it.

"Not this time, I'm afraid. Actually, I need your help." She worried her bottom lip as she had many times in his class when concentrating on a potion.

 _Why do I remember that?_ "I'm sure you have innumerable resources at your disposal, Miss Granger. What could you possibly need from me?"

She reached into the pocket of her cloak and pulled out a small box. "This was found in a… Well, I can't tell you, I suppose, but no one can figure it out."

Snape eyed the object and noticed, with some satisfaction, that the witch wore dragon hide gloves as she handled it. "What's inside?"

"We don't know. Our best experts can't open it."

"Yet you believe that I can?"

"I had hoped, yes. If anyone can..." She trailed off, a faint blush painting her cheeks.

He studied her for a moment before making a decision. Turning on his heels, he motioned for her to follow. Walking down the short hallway that led to the door to the walled back garden, Severus opened it, gesturing for Miss Granger to exit. "Place it there," he said with a wave of his hand.

She did. Carefully placing the box on the small wrought iron table.

"Stay here." He turned and reentered the house to find his own gloves. He didn't think he'd have need to touch the item, but as in all things Severus Snape like to be prepared. Once he had them, he rejoined her. She was exactly where he had left her. Pulling out his wand, he cast a strong ward around the entire table then began dismantling the curse on the box.

Severus had assumed the whole thing to be a ruse to bring her to his house. A means to 'check on him'. But as he worked he started to believe that she had genuinely needed his assistance. It was unlike anything he had ever seen before. For a very brief moment he regretted turning down Kingsley's offer of a job in the Department of Mysteries. It was interesting work, after all. But no. He had his death to plan.

By the time he had finally picked apart the curse and pried open the lid, he was sweating and shaking.

"Are you okay, sir?" Granger asked.

"I'm fine," he panted. "Now, Levitate the object. Carefully."

As she did, his eyes followed it. The cameo floated into the air, hovering just above the box, still well within his protective ward. It was about the size of the end of his thumb. Cream on black. A woman's profile. It was...

" _It's beautiful,"_  she whispered.

"Dark magic often is, Miss Granger. That is the danger in it," he replied without thought.

"I know, sir," she said, her eyes focused on the piece of jewelry. "It pulls and seduces. It's rarely unkind when it weaves itself around you. It feels like an old friend. Like it's always been there. But it's all false. It is a façade."

Severus found himself drawn to her voice like a siren's call. She had spoken softly, whispering as if the object itself could hear. He was still staring at her when she slowly moved her hand to her cloak pocket and produced another box, this one larger. Snape assumed it was magically protected. She had come prepared, it seemed. Levitating the cameo into the new box, she sealed it with a spell. When finished, she expelled a heavy breath then turned to him.

"I can't thank you enough, Professor," she said as she stowed the box back inside her cloak.

Snape ended the ward on the table. She gathered the original box, cast her own spell on it, some sort of protection, he assumed and put it into yet another pocket.

"Yes, well… I…" He stammered.  _What the devil?_ "My time  _is_ valuable, Miss Granger," he said as if he had some pressing engagement awaiting him.

"I'm sure Kingsley will compensate you for your assistance, sir."

"I require no compensation. I simply wish to be left alone," he said, wishing it were true.  _No. It_ is _true. I need time to plan and… Just get her out of here!_

She cocked her head to the side as if she were appraising him. Snape hated being appraised. "Did you read the book?"

"I did," he answered. Of course he'd read the damn book! It had been three weeks since she'd shown up with the gift - and it was a gift - the inscription made that clear. Severus Snape could never resist a book and evidently the little swot knew that.  _Know-it-all!_ He had finished it before bed that night.

"And did you enjoy it?"

"I didn't…  _not_ enjoy it."

She smiled, a small laugh tittering out of her as she stepped towards the door. "Okay. I'll take that."

"You'll have to," he muttered as he followed.

Once back at the front of the house, he caught her looking around, her curiosity getting the better of her. With a gentle hand on her back, he directed her to the foyer and opened the front door. His hand remained a bit longer than strictly necessary. It made him realise just long it had been since he'd had human contact. The Healers didn't count.

"Well, thanks again," she said when standing on the stoop.

"Just don't make it a habit."

"Of course." She turned, but stopped and faced him once again. "Oh, and Professor?"

 _Gods! What now!?_  "Yes?" he said in an exasperated tone.

"I rather like this look on you," she said with a wink, stunning him as she hopped off the stoop and sauntered down the lane.

"That little…" He was running out of names. Slamming the door, he stormed back into his house and flopped down onto the comfortable chair.

**Severus Snape**

The correspondence started after that and Severus decided that Granger may have just lost her mind at some point since the end of the war.

_Professor Snape,_

_Thanks again for your help with the cameo. Kingsley has deposited funds into your account to compensate you and says he's putting you on retainer for the department._

What?! He didn't want a job! He didn't  _need_ a job. There was no reason to plan a future when he didn't expect to be around for it.

_I can't tell you how pleased I was when he told me. We often have cases like the one I brought to you. Our so-called 'experts' don't have nearly the knowledge you do when it comes to the Dark Arts and I could always use a second opinion._

_On a more personal note, the owl is mine so be nice! Her name is Prudence or Prudy. She likes sweets but not too much or she'll get sick. I'm being forced to take some time off at the end of next month (as much as I hate it) and will try to visit then._

_Take care,_

_Hermione J. Granger_

"Take care?" he said out loud. "Of what?" Then he looked at the owl, who was still perched on the arm of his comfy chair, looking at him expectantly and he got up to look for some biscuits. After feeding the thing and he composed a letter, but not to Miss Granger.

"Can you take this to the Minister for Magic for me?" he asked 'Prudence'. The bird hooted, nipped at his finger affectionately and held out her leg.

Once the bird was off on her delivery he sat back down. He was not about to let the Minister or Miss Granger force him into employment. An hour later he received a reply.

_Severus,_

_Why do you have Hermione's bird, first of all? And no, you can not resign. You are officially employed by the Department of Mysteries as an outside consultant and that is final. The only promise I can make is that the position is mostly handled through correspondence so you may continue your existence as a hermit._

_Minister for Magic,_

_Kingsley R. Shacklebolt_

"Damn and blast!"

Oh, he was pissed off now. His unhappy little life was suddenly turned upside down and all because of Granger. He looked at the bird that was sitting on the back of one of his kitchen chairs. "You expect a biscuit, don't you?"

She hooted.

Standing, he fetched a biscuit from the tin and fed it to the owl. It wasn't her fault that her owner was an inconsiderate twat! Grabbing a parchment and quill, he sat down and started to write. When finished, he smiled.  _That ought to do it,_ he thought as he tied the letter to Prudy's leg.

Satisfied with his missive, Severus poured himself two fingers of firewhisky and settled into his chair with a sigh. He must have fallen to sleep (not really his fault - the chair was ridiculously comfortable!) because he was awoken by a pecking on his window.

" _Merlin's gonads!"_  he grumbled as he made his way to the kitchen. "Of course." He opened it and the little brown owl flew in. "What does she have to say for herself, I wonder…"

_Professor Snape,_

He rolled his eyes. He had insulted her (with the most creative language he could think of) and she still insisted on the formal address.

_I will take that as a compliment coming from you, thank you very much! And no, I do not plan on stopping my visits. I find you interesting and arresting. A mind like yours is wasted sitting in a cottage at the Arse End of Hogsmeade. If I can engage it, I will! Stop me by force, but your sharp tongue no longer frightens me, sir._

_Yours,_

_Hermione J. Granger_

He crumpled it up, throwing it across the room. Turning to the owl, he shouted, "Go home!" The frightened little thing immediately flew out the window and for a split second he felt bad for scaring her. "I'm officially loopy!" he said, shaking his head.

Hands on his hips, he stood, seething. After several minutes he made a decision. Grabbing his traveling cloak, he marched out the back door, pausing only to ward the house and Apparated to the gates of Hogwarts.

Hagrid let him in and after a brief conversation, Severus made his way to the castle. Thankfully, Minerva hadn't changed her password since she had last invited him for tea, an offer he promptly turned down.

"Tartan tea room," he said, not understanding for a moment what  _that_ was supposed to mean other than the fact that the Headmistress had a deep love for both tartan and tea… he had no idea.

"Severus," she greeted when he stormed into the open door of her office. "What a surprise."

"What did you tell Hermione Granger?!" he demanded.

"Oh, I'm fine, other than some aching joints, but that's to be expected at my age, I suppose. Thanks for asking and you?"

"I'm in no mood," he hissed as he paced. "That witch isn't afraid of me. Not in the least. So you must have…" The moment it dawned on him he felt like the world's biggest fool. How had he not seen it?  _The book. The Dark Arts book. She knows._  "How  _could_ you, Minerva?" Granger knew about his will and the witch in front of him had told her.  _Gods..._ He felt humiliated.

She didn't even have the decency to  _appear_ ashamed. "I needed to know why, Severus."

"And did you not think to ask  _me_?" he asked, his eyes fixed on the floor.

"You were still in a state. I…"

Looking up, he said, "So you spilled my secrets to the  _girl_?"

"She would have known if you'd been successful."

" _But I wasn't!"_  he growled, leaning across the desk. Only then did he glance up, letting his eyes find the portrait of the man he least wanted to see. Their eyes met for a split second before Severus turned, forcing himself to look away.

He stood in the middle of the office that had once been so familiar, had been… his for one long, horrible year, and attempted to shield himself. But his defenses were gone.

 _This_ was the reason why he couldn't take it anymore.  _This_ was why he just wanted it to be over. Occlumency had always been his best defense, his  _only_ defense and it had left him.

When he had awoken in St. Mungo's his shields were gone. He lay there for nearly three months, reliving the nightmare that was his life, unable to shut it out.

 _Come on, come on,_  he chanted, calling on every ounce of control to erect some kind of barrier to protect his fragile psyche, but it was no use. He had some potions that would help. They could block out some emotional pain and offer short-term solutions, but nothing could replace nearly thirty years of discipline and what he had always thought was an innate ability.

 _Please, please, please,_  he begged his mind.

Minerva's hand on his shoulder pulled him out of his attempts at inner focus. "She cares, Severus. You cannot fault her for that," she said softly.

"I fault you all for your care," he replied, his body relaxing slightly under Minerva's gentle touch. He hated himself for needing it so damn much. "I am beyond…" he didn't finish his sentence.

"Beyond what, Severus?"

"Just… beyond," he said after several seconds. Then, as much as it pained him to do so, he stepped away from the older witch and her warm hand, walking out of the familiar office to return to his cottage and his comfy chair. He had potions there, they would help.

Besides, he still had his death to plan.

**Hermione Granger - Visit #3**

The letters didn't stop, but they did sometimes come with unexpected treats: a tin of homemade cookies, her favourite tea she wanted him to try, another book. He never replied, never encouraged her. Twice she sent him letters with official Department of Mysteries letterhead, asking for advice on a matter. These he answered, lest he have Kingsley on his back.

It was all very distracting. The cookies were delicious, the tea quite charming and the book engaging. And as much as he hated to admit it, he  _had_  enjoyed working out the problems she had sent him. But she was keeping his focus from his ultimate goal.

The witch was getting to him.  _One problem at a time, Snape!_  he'd tell himself. If he could solve the problem with Hermione Granger, then he could redirect his attention back to his death.

One day, three weeks after his conversation with Minerva, Severus decided that the  _ever questioning Granger_  just wanted answers. So he decided that the next time she came by, he'd give them to her. He'd also give her the scare of her prim little life.

She had been cropping up in his dreams since her first visit. Oh, he had dreamed of the pretty witch in the past (he was a man, for Merlin's sake). Her appearance at his trial had sparked the first, but they had taken a decidedly lascivious turn since she'd shown up at the cottage. He could use that!

In his dreams, she writhed and moaned underneath him as he feasted on her, pleasured her with his mouth and hands. She called out his name as he drove into to her from behind. He'd had her up against his impressive book collection, on the desk in his study and, of course, in his bed. In one of his favourite scenarios, she knelt at his feet, sucking him off as he sat in his  _extremely_  comfortable chair.

So his plotting mind centered on Miss Granger, for the time being. He'd get back to his eventual demise once the annoying pest was dealt with.

He didn't have to wait long. She turned up less than a week after he had settled on an idea.

"Ah, Miss Granger, what a surprise," he said, sounding as  _un_ surprised as possible.

She seemed taken aback… finally. "Hello. I promised I visit whilst on holiday. So, here I am."

"Here you are," he echoed. "Do come in." Taking a step back, he opened the door widely.

Though she looked slightly suspicious, she stepped into his house and smiled.

"Tea?" he asked as he put his hands on her shoulders to help her with her light Spring cloak. Though it was the beginning of summer, the weather had yet to turn completely warm.

Tilting her head to the side, she said, "Sure."

He hung her cloak, directed her to the lounge then made his way to the kitchen.  _Her mind must be running wild at this point_. He imagined her seated on his divan, trying to figure out his game. Would he poison her? Kidnap her and lock her in the cellar? He could barely contain his laughter.  _When did I last laugh?_  he wondered. It didn't matter. Having her wrong-footed was the goal for the beginning of his little trap, then he'd slip in with the information he knew she wanted and follow-up with the fear-factor.  _I am a testament to my House!_

Finishing the tea, he carried it in, setting it on the coffee table between them. "Milk or sugar?"

"Both, please."

He prepared it for her, handing her a cup before taking his own and sitting back, getting comfortable for their little chat.

"So, Professor, how've you been?"

"Well, thank you. And yourself?"  _By all the gods,_  he hated small talk.

"I'm fine. I hate taking time off from work, but Rogers, my boss, insisted." She sipped her tea. "Three weeks," she added with a roll of her eyes. "What am I supposed to do with myself for three weeks?"

 _I assume you plan on driving me the rest of the way to insanity,_ he thought as he sat down his cup. "There is actually something I wished to speak to you about, Miss Granger."

"It's lucky that I stopped by, then."

"Indeed." He couldn't keep the sneer off his face. "I am aware of the fact that the Headmistress visited you just after my… failed attempt to end my life." He hadn't spoken to anyone about that day. Oh, he'd had many conversations with  _himself_ about his utter failure, but never out loud… to another person. It surprised him that he found the topic so painful.

"She did."

"And I am also aware that she disclosed some information to you.  _Delicate_  information about my personal affairs."

"Since they involved me, sir, I'm not sure if they are completely personal. Exclusively, that is."

He ignored her perfectly reasonable argument. "It is, of course, the reason for your continued presence in my home, in my life, however." She opened her mouth to no doubt argue, but he wouldn't allow it. "I am willing to offer an explanation, Miss Granger, if for no other reason halt your needless visits."

She looked intrigued. Placing her cup on the table, she scooted to the edge of the settee. "You're going to tell me why you wrote me into your will? Why you willed me your books?"

"Yes."

"Hmm… I have to say, Professor, I was  _not_ expecting that."

"I didn't think you would be. No doubt you thought of employing some sort of trickery, feeble though it might be, to get to the truth. Not necessary, Miss Granger. It's really quite simple."

"Is it now?"

He nodded. "I could think of no one who would appreciate them quite as much as you."

She raised an eyebrow.

"Hogwarts has Albus'..." The name caused a slight pain to arch through his chest, but he ignored it. "... collection. He and I had many of the same books. Except for my Dark Arts collection, which they would not place in the library. Those books would have been put in storage, deep in the bowels of the castle. You, on the other hand, would have made use of them, given your chosen work." Satisfied with his explanation, he picked up his tea and took a sip.

"Thank you for that, sir."

There was something in her reply that unsettled him. It sounded… disbelieving, but he decided he was being paranoid. There was no way he had not convinced the little chit of his reasoning. It was sound, after all. And the truth. Or at least some version of it.

He rose. Time to implement the final stage of his plan.

"Now, if you don't mind, Miss Granger, my day is not spent lolling about, idly doing nothing. I do have things to accomplish…"

She stood and he walked her to the foyer.

As he helped her with her cloak, like a true gentleman, he leant down and whispered, "Oh, and one more thing." He then took her by the shoulders, turned her and pushed her up against the door. " _Do not return_."

The witch was, of course, shocked by his sudden change in demeanor, she gasped as he pressed his body against hers.

"I am many things, Miss Granger, but I am  _still a man._  Your continued presence causes me much distress." Grinding his growing erection against her belly, he said, "I may be nearing the end of my days, but as you can tell I'm still a fully functioning human being. Your  _cloying kindness_  isn't enough to obscure the fact that you have a lovely set of tits and an arse to match. If you return again, I shall take it to mean that you have more to offer me than a book or an interesting puzzle." He cupped the back of her head and tugged her hair, pulling her eyes up to meet his. "Am. I. Clear?"

She met his gaze with a fire he had not witnessed in many,  _many_  years. For a moment he was almost sorry for having to scare her off. But it was no use, she was distracting him from his goal. She had to go.

"Crystal, sir," she said in a voice completely devoid of fear.

Seconds ticked by. He had the most unnatural urge to close the distance, press his lips to hers and kiss that look of defiance right off her pretty little face. Finally, however, he stepped back, pulled her with him, and in one smooth move opened the door.

"Have a good day, Miss Granger."

Never breaking eye contact, she replied, "You too, sir," as she left.

Severus sighed. Thankfully, it was over. It was unsettling and though necessary, not something he particularly enjoyed. Now that it was done, however, he could get on with planning his end.

Turning, he walked into the lounge. He collected the tea things, placing them back on the tray and took them into the kitchen.  _I should wash these up first_ , he thought. Once that was finished it was nearly time for the evening meal. He didn't like planning on an empty stomach or without a full night's sleep.

In the end, he decided to start fresh the next day. What was one more day of the miserable life he'd been living?


	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. Glad you all liked the first part. Things will be heating up a bit in the later part of this chapter. Big thanks to my betas and friends for all their help, but once again I take full credit for all mistakes.
> 
> Warning: There is a very brief mention of rape in this chapter but not in reference to either Severus or Hermione.
> 
> I still own nothing. Enjoy ~Lil~

**Hermione Granger - Visit #4**

He had overslept… again. Sitting up and getting his bearings, he rubbed his eyes and let the cloud of sleep drift from his mind.  _No matter,_  he thought.  _I'm finally free of Granger._  A strange new sadness overcame him at that moment. He was accustomed to sadness. It was all he had felt since awakening after the Final Battle, but this was different.

During his months of recovery from Nagini's bite, Severus spent his days being harassed by Healers and mediwitches and his nights in a potion-induced fog. His wounds were incredibly painful, the physiotherapy tedious and his mind a jumble of guilt, remorse and self-hatred.

When he realised that his shields were gone he felt utterly betrayed and absolutely terrified. How could he deal with the things he had done without any defenses?

The Dark Arts were not like other Magics. They were almost alive. Almost a sentient thing in and of themselves.

Most wizards who had delved so deeply into the Dark had little or no conscience and therefore had no need to protect themselves from the creeping decay or from their own acts.

Severus wasn't like those wizards.

Whether he was aware of this was hard to discern. His self-awareness was… odd to say the least. He hated himself, the things he had done, the person he'd become and was, therefore, unable to reconcile himself with any kind of forgiveness. His survival angered him, his acquittal perplexed him and his apparent acceptance by the Wizarding world disturbed him. But these traits that set him apart enabled him to carry out the acts that would turn the tide of the war.

They were his saving grace and his greatest weakness at the same time.

What made him different were two simple facts:

First of all, he was a Natural Occlumens. Born with the innate ability to Occlude, Severus had honed the skill before he was even aware he was doing it. Whilst his father abused him, his mother neglected him and his classmates bullied and tormented him, his mind was protecting him and by the time he left Hogwarts he was already well on his way to its mastery.

Second, and possibly most important, he possessed a fully functioning conscience. It was the reason he turned to Dumbledore, asking for his help when he realised what he had done. Yes, Lily was at the core of his reasoning, but the realisation of what could happen to his only friend (even if that friendship was long over) sparked the beginning of an enlightenment, of sorts. To have witnessed his behaviour as a professor, one would not believe this fact, but it was true.

He was not truly evil, of course, because love cannot exist where only Darkness dwells. The Dark Lord proved that fact and Severus Snape had loved, fully and completely.

He did  _not_ enjoy tormenting children. Well, not much. His shields provided his cover. He hid every feeling, every emotion behind them. He was not a kind man, of course, he had never been taught to  _be_ kind, but he had witnessed cruelty throughout his life and did not take pleasure from doling it out, even to young Mr. Potter. It was a fortunate chance of DNA that Harry looked so much like James; if he had looked like Lily… Severus wondered often if he could have held onto the hatred he felt for his childhood tormenter enough to make the appropriate displays of disdain.

For the most part, Severus felt little to nothing at all in those years leading up to the final confrontation. Oh, there were moments that he wanted to rattle the boy's head. His mother had sacrificed her life for the boy and here Potter was so cavalierly putting it on the line again and again when he was needed to avenge the woman. But he carefully hid most of his emotions behind his shields, letting only his disdain and anger out at the appropriate times. At first sight, the wizard had been shaken to his core having to actually see the physical representation of his Lily's love for another man. Yes, on some level, Severus hated Harry Potter, but perhaps not quite as vehemently as it often appeared. Besides, he was half Lily. Severus was reminded of this every time he looked into the boy's eyes. He did care for the child, in his own way.

Those years of teaching The Golden Trio were somehow even harder than the years of abuse he had taken from him father and peers. His shields were almost constantly in use, his guard always up. Severus took comfort where he could find it: in a  _very_ strong headache potion (of his own creation) because utilising Occlumency that often left him with blinding migraines, and his beloved books.

His mind had been his only true ally and greatest supporter throughout the war. He had a job to do and he could accomplish it, he could fool the Dark Lord and a school full of hapless children as long as his mind did not betray him.

Then, when it was all over, it did.

Upon waking up, having no mission to complete, having no death to avenge, having no one to protect and no barriers to hold back the Darkness, he started to crumble.

He knew that his mind would not last much longer without the protection of his Occlumency. He was living on borrowed time as it was. The potions he brewed would only protect him for so long.

Severus took a deep breath and headed for his bathroom. He had a day to start, no matter how late it was, and a death to plan. His potions would help keep the jumble of Darkness at bay long enough to get through it all.

 _A shower first,_  he thought.

o0o0o0o0o

Hermione Granger very much believed in the power of research. After the Headmistress' visit, she spoke with Kingsley Shacklebolt. He had  _some_ information, but nothing that differed too much from Minerva's. His only additional insight was that something was going on with the former spy beyond depression or even PTSD.

The Wizarding world had experienced its fair share of mental illness since the war. Whereas before 'mind maladies', as most magical folks like to call them, were once ignored, now that so many were suffering, it could  _not_ be overlooked. Kingsley was convinced that Snape's problem was somehow both Magical and Muggle in origin.

" _Why do you think that?" she asked the Minister._

_He thinned his lips and shook his head. "It's hard to explain, Hermione. Snape has always been the most closed up, repressed bastard I've ever known. The only emotion I've ever seen him express is anger but right after he woke up, he was… Well, he cried. I'm sure he didn't know I was there - in the doorway, that is - but there was no denying it. It looked like a dam was breaking. He sobbed."_

That was her first clue to the puzzle that was Severus Snape. A 'breaking dam' was a very apt description if her suspicions were correct.

She started her research shortly thereafter. Two weeks later, she made her first visit. Her recon mission had been a success. Visit number two was even more informative. After that, more research was needed to confirm her theory.

As she had read over all of her compiled information in her neat Muggle notebook, Hermione had become even more confident in her hypothesis. Her first visit of her forced holiday, she had planned on broaching her research with the irascible wizard.

His friendly demeanor had thrown her for a moment upon her arrival, but she didn't let it get to her. Then he had flung that load of unicorn shit at her about why he'd left her his books in his will.  _Right!_   _I was born on a Tuesday, but it wasn't yesterday_ , she'd thought, watching him as he spun his little tale of logic and ' _no one who would appreciate them as much as you'._  It had taken everything in her power not to laugh in his face. When he had walked her to the door and pushed her up against it, grinding his  _impressive_ cock into her belly, she had to admit it had shocked her. She hadn't anticipated him using sex as a scare tactic.

Fortunately for her, it was his biggest mistake yet.

Tempting a witch who was already sexually attracted to him was a huge error in judgment and the former spy would pay for letting his guard down.

Hermione Granger not only lusted after his formative mind, but those hands… that voice… that arse in Muggle jeans!

Oh, yes. She would use every available tactic to help him find some peace and rejoin the living world. And if she happened to find her way into his bed in the process, so be it!

She carefully dressed for her trip to his cottage, this time she chose Muggle clothes: a light summer dress and cardigan. The weather had turned overnight, warming to a wonderful 25 degrees and she was going to enjoy it. She picked up her small beaded bag (packed well in advance), tossed it over her shoulder and waved goodbye to Prudy. Repeating her instructions to the owl as she opened the door, she was off. She had nearly three weeks of free time and a brilliant wizard to fix.

o0o0o0o0o

 _Nothing_ could have shocked Severus more than finding Hermione Granger, dressed like she was on holiday, standing on his front stoop shortly following lunch the day after he had practically sexually assaulted her.

He was speechless.

"Are you going to invite me in or stand there catching flies?" she asked, a sweet smile on her lips.

Taking a step back, he gave her room to enter the cottage.

"See? That wasn't so hard." She patted his chest as she passed. "I'll make tea."

The door was still opened, held in his white-knuckled grip as he watched her prance down the hall then slip into the entrance of his kitchen. He finally found his composure and closed the door. "What…?" he heard himself ask as he followed after the impertinent witch.

She was  _indeed_ making herself quite at home at his hob, preparing tea the Muggle way (like he did), and seemingly enjoying herself.

He could not allow this to continue.  _How dare she?_! "Miss Granger, did I not make myself clear yesterday?"

Turning, she said, "You did," with a nod of her head, then got back to work.

"And you understood that I was speaking about… sex, did you not?"

"Yes. I did," she replied without turning around.

"Then why, may I ask, are you here?"

Facing him, hands on her hips, she smirked. "Because I'm more than willing, Severus,  _and_  because your 'Big Bad Wolf' routine didn't scare me off." The kettle whistled and she pulled it off the hob, pouring the water into the pot.

"My  _what_?"

Ignoring him, she finished the tea, bringing the tray to the table. Oh, it seemed they were going to take their tea like civilised people today! Miss Granger sat, gesturing across from her then prepared them each a cup.

"You were trying to scare me off, Severus. I'm not stupid. Brightest Witch of My Age, remember?" She daintily sipped her drink.

Her personality was completely different, well, perhaps not completely, but she was suddenly speaking to him with an uncomfortable level of familiarity. And cheek! This had to stop. "I do not recall giving you permission to address me by my first name."

"You rubbed your penis into my stomach yesterday. The permission was implied. You, of course, may call me Hermione, if you like."

Needing a moment to gather himself (lest he hex the little chit!), he picked up his cup and drank. The witch was always surprising him. Severus hated surprises!

"Now that we've established that I am  _not_ afraid of you, or you massive cock…" Her eyes had the nerve to twinkle at him! "... I can tell you why I've been coming 'round, annoying you with my  _cloying kindness_ ," she said, not bothering to disguise her distaste for his choice of words. "It's not actually because of the will - though your explanation  _was_ entertaining, I must say. No, the real reason is that I believe I know what's going on with you, Severus."

Half of his mind was still stuck on 'massive cock' part of her statement but he forced himself to sneer appropriately. "Of course you do, Miss Granger. You are a…"

"Know-it-all! By all means, let's get that out of the way early so we can move on to the important bits, yeah?"

Severus gripped his cup tightly in an attempt to keep from reaching for his wand.

"You're going to have to trust me, Severus. Well, trust me as much as you can trust anyone. I know you have issues there. Understandable, given your history. If you can, however, I do believe that I will be able to help you."

She leant forward on the table, her face sobering. "We all, in the department, have specialties. Mine is Dark magic, as you probably figured out by the items on which I asked for your input. I had been studying Occlumency, of course, and had a rudimentary knowledge of it by the time I had finished my training, but was far from mastering it. On my first real mission, I was sent undercover into a cluster of Dark Mages. One of them was a Legilimens; a very well kept secret, unfortunately. I was unprepared. The only thing that saved me is that he was clumsy; I felt his entry and was able to make a hasty retreat. After that, I was determined to learn everything I could about Occlumency and have the best shields possible. I didn't want to feel that vulnerable ever again."

She paused, perhaps waiting for disbelief on his part, but she wouldn't get it. If anyone could simply teach themselves Occlumency - master it - it was Hermione Granger.

Apparently satisfied with his silence, she continued, "You haven't used your shields once in my presence. Looking back, I am certain that you utilised them whilst I was in school. Almost constantly, if I'm correct. Why?"

Severus had a choice. He could either continue to keep his secret - he'd never mentioned the problem to the Healers or to the people who had been trying to help him - or he could tell her. She seemed to have some knowledge. Knowing her, she had an overabundance of it.

Once again, he was letting her divert his attention from THE PLAN! This little slip of a witch had occupied his mind for nigh on two months - distracting him - and, worst of all, if he allowed it, she would give him… hope. The most dangerous thing he could imagine.

Settled then.

"I have no idea to what you are referring, Miss Granger," he said, without a hint of emotion.

She rolled her eyes. "Okay. You want to be that way? Fine. I'm going to pretend that instead of your vehement denial, you said 'Yes, Hermione, you are correct. I've  _not_ been able to control Occlumency shields since the end of the war. Please, oh, brilliant and charming Gryffindor witch, tell me what you have learned and how you might aid me. I will be ever so grateful.' Or something to that effect."

Rendered speechless for the second time, Severus sat staring across the table at the insolent little…  _Damn! Note to self: think of more creative names for Hermione Granger!_  He stood. "I think it's time for you to leave," he growled.

Miss Granger rose as well, then sauntered (yes, sauntered!) towards him. "Severus, your shields are still there. They are still working. If not, you would have gone mad," she said, her large whisky coloured eyes staring up at him imploringly.

His very first thought was,  _I already have_ ; his second, he spoke out loud, "What the devil are you talking about?"

"You possess more Dark knowledge than any living wizard, at the very least in England, possibly in the UK, perhaps in the entire world. If your shields were not intact, you would have lost your mind shortly after waking up." She paused, giving him a moment before continuing, "Think about it, Severus, twenty - more like thirty - years of Dark Arts spells, curses, potions, hell, experiences would have broken free and flooded you upon waking if your shields weren't holding them back."

"I am using potions…"

"I assumed that you were. But you and I both know that there is no such thing.  _Nothing_  produced in a Potions lab can replicate the use of Occlumency." She gave him a knowing look. "You've made some kind of antidepressant, haven't you? If it was anything stronger you certainly wouldn't be acting like yourself."

"You presume too much!" he said, seething at the idea that she could have figured it out when he never even  _considered_ this possibility. Not to mention the fact that she had nailed the type of potion he was using. "You seem to forget that I was once a Death Eater! The most likely explanation is that I am simply a  _black soul_  without a conscience and the Darkness does not affect me, Miss Granger!" He didn't even believe this, not really, but she didn't need to know that.

"No." Folding her arms over her chest, she leant one hip against his kitchen counter. "Not possible."

"And why is that?"

"Because you loved her."

The kitchen was deadly silent. She had him and he knew it.

"Your soul is not black, Severus. Quite the opposite, I'd say." Taking a step forward, she lay her palm flat against his chest, just over his heart. " _Darkness cannot thrive where love abides,"_  she whispered.

Several minutes passed as he processed her words. He didn't want this… this hope. Or did he? "What would you have me do?" He was defeated and he knew it.

She smiled and removed her hand. "I have three ideas."

"Of course you do."

"The first is the most unpleasant."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Get on with it then."

"Can we go to the lounge? Please?"

"I suppose," he said, his tone made him want to wince. How had this happened? How had he lost all control to this silly little witch?

o0o0o0o0o

She had gotten past the first hurdle. He had listened. Now she just had to get him to  _continue_ to listen.

Once settled, her on his sofa and him in that incredibly comfortable looking chair of his, Hermione took a deep breath and started to speak…

"Few people are aware of the protection Occlumency offers. For the most part, only those of us who use it are aware of this. It not only protects our minds from Legilimency and from Dark magic, but from other things as well."

Severus rolled his eyes. "I always did enjoy a good lecture. Especially on that of which I am fully informed."

 _Do not hex him. Do_ not  _hex him!_  "I need you to describe to me the difference between an Occlumens and a Natural Occlumens. Please," she said, looking him straight in the eyes.

"Is this a joke?"

"No, not at all. I know you must be aware of it, Severus. But I have to know that you have a complete understanding before we continue."

He sighed, rolled his eyes and said, "A Natural Occlumens, like…  _me_ , is born with the innate ability. It will manifest at some point in the witch or wizard's life, though if not nurtured, expanded upon, it will not increase, so to speak. An Occlumens, that's you, is simply a person that practices Occlumency. Is that what you were looking for, Miss Granger?"

"It's exactly what I was looking for, Severus." She exhaled a relieved breath. "Now, when did you first use Occlumency?" This was  _the_ question. The one that would start it all.

He looked thoughtful for a moment, his eyes staring off into the room before returning his gaze to her. "Fourth, perhaps fifth year."

"No, Severus. The  _first_ time." She leant forward. "The very first time."

"I just told you!"

"In many cases, most actually, Natural Occlumens are first jolted into use by a traumatic event. Something so traumatising that the wizard or witch's magic reaches down and grabs onto the most stabilising force it can find. In an Occlumens, that would be their shields. It took a while, but I found a couple of books…"

"Of course you fucking did," he mumbled.

"In Victorian Times, there was an interesting study of nine Natural Occlumens and twelve Occlumens by a Mr. Thoman L. Ludlow. He hypothesised that the Naturals were much stronger and made excellent Dark wizard hunters - as they were considered at the time - because they could more easily 'obscure the Dark' as he put it," she explained. "In a second book, another study chronicled the 'first times' of these same twenty-one individuals. Ludlow's apprentice, Mr. Daniel McElhatton, took on this part of the work. Seven of the nine Natural Occlumens experienced a traumatic event, most under the age of fourteen, that brought about the first occurrences of their shields."

"What the bloody hell do twenty-one Victorian Occlumens have to do with me?!"

"I think we need to…  _kick start_  your Occlumency, Severus. Like when you were a child." She gave him a moment to consider her words then said, "Now, the truth, please. What was your first experience with Occlumency?"

He averted his eyes, turning to look out the window across from him. After a couple of minutes, he said, "What is this 'unpleasant' idea of yours?"

"Regression therapy," she said.

His gaze returned to her as he raised a questioning eyebrow.

"It would involve hypnotherapy, taking you back to that moment in your childhood which was so traumatic that your shields automatically appeared. A sort of 'deaging' but not in the literal sense. Your mind would be a child again, Severus, reliving that moment." She leant forward. "Could you handle that?"

"You could do this? Regress me? It sounds wholly Muggle, by the way."

"It is, actually. And no, I'm not qualified and I cannot hypnotise you. That is if you can even  _be_ hypnotised. Since your shields are still there, still protecting you, they may fight the hypnosis."

"Not really an option, then," he said, sounding defeated. "Who…?"

"There is a Squib therapist working with witches and wizards. I've spoken to him, he is familiar with this therapy. I have not mentioned you at all, Severus. I would not do that without your permission."

He nodded and Hermione took that to mean that he believed her. Perhaps was starting to trust her.

After a few moments, he sat forward, his elbows on his knees. "I was maybe seven, I think. They had been fighting, all day until he left…"

"Who?"

"My parents."

Hermione nodded.

"He came back a couple of hours later, drunk, of course, and dragged Mum into their bedroom." Closing his eyes, he scrubbed his hands over his face. "I didn't know what was happening. Children shouldn't know about those kinds of things…"

She quietly moved from the sofa to the coffee table, sitting directly in front of him. Unfortunately, she had an idea of what was coming next. This was very unexpected. Hermione had not anticipated him opening up at all, at least not at this stage. His hands still covered his face, so she reached up, carefully pulling them away. "What kinds of things, Severus?" she asked, holding his hands in hers.

"He was raping her. I could hear them. Mum was screaming, begging him to stop. He was grunting and calling her all sorts of names. Horrible things I'd never heard before, even from him."

Hermione squeezed his hands, rubbing her thumbs over the backs of them. "Then what happened?"

His head was tucked, he hadn't looked up. "Suddenly my mind was somewhere else. I could see the park about a mile from our house. It was a warm summer day and there were a couple of kids playing. I couldn't hear  _them_ anymore, my parents. I could only hear birds, and the swingset creaking and the kids laughing. I heard someone call out my name, a girl. A redhead I'd seen a few weeks before. It was Lily." He looked up. "I wouldn't know that for a couple more years. We didn't meet, officially, until we were ten, but she'd been there, evidently." Expelling a long breath, Severus' body relaxed. "I stayed there, in that place, for as long as I could, watching the kids play. When I 'left', the house was quiet. I walked out of my room and tried to find them. Dad had passed out on the bathroom floor. Mum was on the bed, bloody and sobbing. She told me to leave her be, so I did."

She had to take a deep breath to compose herself. That had been horrific.  _No wonder he had been obsessed with Lily Evans_. Hermione, released his hands, moving hers to his knees. "And did you continue to use your shields after that?"

"Yes," he said with a nod. "It took a while, but I finally figured out how to go to that place whenever I wanted, needed to. Then I realised that I could use them and stay in the present. I could close my emotions behind a wall whilst still maintaining my normal life." After thinking for a moment, he said, "That happened around fourth year."

 _He must have been a remarkable student,_  she thought.  _That mind of his..._  She suppressed a shiver; now was simply not the time. "Have you always used the park as your focus point?"

"No. It changed after…" He paused and Hermione had a feeling she knew why.

"After what?"

"After Lily died." He shook his head. "I couldn't find any peace there."

"Understandable." She sat back, breaking all physical contact. "Try again for me. Try to access your shields."

"With the park?" he asked, his eyes looked panicked.

"Use whatever brings you the most peace, Severus."

He drew a deep breath and closed his eyes. He should have been able to do this without any external signs, she was sure he had done so many times in her presence without her or anyone else noticing. That kind of control took time, mastery. He'd get there again… eventually.

Two minutes later, he opened them. "Nothing," he said, his tone defeated.

"It was a long shot. We didn't do anything there except remember your original trigger." She stood. "Wait here. I'll be right back."

o0o0o0o0o

 _Bloody hell, that was awful!_ he thought, slumping back in his chair. He was too emotionally strung out to even consider the amount of personal information he'd just handed over to Hermione  _bloody_ Granger. He'd deal with that later, or he'd just kill himself and never have to think about all of this humiliation ever again!

His childhood was traumatic, nearly all of his memories were scarring, but that one had shaped him in a way that he couldn't even begin to dissect. It had kept him from participating in the raping and beating of Muggle women, however. His excuse to the Dark Lord wasn't one he had to fabricate. He simply let the psychopath see his memory of that day and led his master to believe that he cherished his lowly witch of a mother so much that when his wretched Muggle father had beaten and raped the woman, he vowed to never harm a female in such a way. And, it was the truth. Oddly, Riddle found this amusing, even honourable, and allowed Severus to 'sit out' the more debaucherous parts of the Darks Revels, praising Severus' hatred of Tobias and his Muggle ways.

His poor abused mum never knew what her sacrifice had given her only son.

Granger was returning. With a bag. A small bag. Severus felt light-headed and foggy. He certainly hoped her other two 'ideas' were less painful than her first.

Pulling out a small rectangular box from the bag, she sat it on the floor in the middle of the room. Looking around, he realised that she had moved (or  _re_ moved) several items of furniture. The only thing left was his beloved chair. The box she had produced was slightly ornate: it looked like a shrunken wardrobe. She pulled her wand and smiled.

"Severus, will you join me?" she asked.

He stood and moved next to her as she enlarged the box.  _Of course,_ he thought. This one actually made some sense to him. "My Boggart, Miss Granger?"

She nodded. "Do you know what it is?"

"I haven't seen it since fifth year," he answered.  _Do not ask me what it was, you chit! I've given you too much already!_

"It will most likely have changed, you know."

 _No doubt it has,_  he thought and nodded toward the cabinet.

Miss Granger took several steps to the side, as to not get in the Boggart's line of sight, and cast a spell to open the cabinet. It flew out, swirling around in black and gray smoke. For several seconds it seemed to be… confused, if Severus was being honest. Then finally it formed into a potions bench. The bench was completely clear of ingredients and equipment, the only thing on it was a single silver cauldron, filled with innocuous-looking amber coloured liquid.

He knew exactly what it was but it made absolutely no sense.

"Severus?"

 _Why?_  he asked himself as he stared at the potion. How was  _this_ his greatest fear? It wasn't, of course, it was his ultimate goal. His prize! His reward! He was owed this!

"What's in the cauldron, Severus?" he heard her asking, but could not manage to speak.

His shields! They must be fucking with him! Granger said that they were still up, still working to protect him so…  _No!_  They wouldn't feed him a false Boggart image! They couldn't. And what would be the point, anyway?

"Severus! What  _is_ that potion?!" Granger was shouting now.

"Sine dolore est mors in capturam*," he whispered.

She gasped. "Draught of Painless Death!?"

"Yes."

"Have you brewed it?"

"No."

"Why not?"

" _Evidently_ ," he said, drawing out the word. "I am... afraid... of dying." The realisation left him cold and hollow. What did he have now? Nothing! Nothing whatsoever!

"Now, Severus! Erect your shields!" she shouted.

"Why? What's the point?"

"They are meant to protect you, you idiot!"

Never taking his eyes off of the cauldron, he said, "Protect me from what, Granger?! I have nothing. I  _am_ nothing!"

"Oh… for all the senseless, pigheaded…" she mumbled as stepped between him and the bench. It instantly changed, becoming two Muggles, a man and a woman. They were furious, whoever they were, silently screaming at the witch. Raising her wand, she shouted, " _Riddikulus!"_  and the Muggles turned into two large kangaroos. Fully dressed kangaroos as a matter of fact, complete with hats and handbags. After expelling a deep breath, she sent the Boggart back into the cupboard and shrunk it once again.

Granger turned to him, hands on her hips. "Okay, I didn't really hold out much hope that your Boggart would  _actually_ scare your shields into place. But I cannot deny the results."

"I want you to leave," Severus demanded then looked around the lounge. " _After_  you return my furniture."

Flippantly jabbing her wand, she did as he asked, and his coffee table, sideboard and sofa were returned to their original places. The 'other' chairs, however - the uncomfortable ones that usually sat across from the sofa - were up against the wall near the entryway to the kitchen.  _Who cares,_  he thought.  _I can rearrange the damn furniture later_. He just wanted rid of her and her 'help'.

He turned to face the witch as it seemed she had no intention of leaving his home, and said, "You have made me recall my most horrific childhood memory and proven that my greatest fear is my own death - something which I was quite looking forward to until you ruined it, by the way - so, if you're waiting on a 'thank you' you'll be waiting until I die of old age. Which seems like my only option at this point."

"I told you that I had three ideas, you angry old shit, and I'm not leaving until we've tried all three!" Her former cocky composure was all but gone.

"Really?" he sneered. "What do you have planned for an encore, Granger? I believe I have one living relative. Shall I fetch Great Auntie Prunella so that you might break her old arthritic kneecaps in front of me whilst plucking the bristles out of my favourite broom?"**

"Oh, for God's sake, Severus! Would you stop it with the self-pity!? You are brilliant and powerful and  **alive**! Your childhood sucked. It sucked big dragon dicks! I can't even imagine what you went through. No child should have gone through that! And, if I understand correctly, Hogwarts wasn't much better. You made some really awful choices, and you hurt your best friend." Her voice was softening by the end of her sentence. "But you spent  _years_ trying to make up for it. And you succeeded, Severus. We won! You… won."

She moved forward, taking his hands in hers. They were so much smaller than his and so warm. Gods, how he missed being touched…

"You don't have to keep doing this. And you especially don't have to keep doing it alone. I'm here now. I want to help…"

"Why?" It was the question he'd been wanting to ask since she'd started her explanation during 'tea time'. "Why do you want to help so damn bad?"

"Because you're worth it. Because you're interesting. Because you're hurting and I can't stand…"

"I'm not a fucking house-elf, Granger!" He tried to pull out of her hold, but she was surprisingly strong for such a small thing.

"No. Of course you're not. You are Severus Snape, Potions master. Dark Arts expert. Spy. Ex Death Eater. Hero. Recipient of an Order of Merlin, First Class. You are my former professor and though you were a bastard most of the time, I learned  _so much_  from you. You don't deserve to fade away. We don't deserve to be without you." She smiled sweetly. "Besides, I happen to find you quite dishy."

He stared at her for a moment before asking, "What?"

"You heard me. It certainly helps with the next thing I'd like to try."

"And what's that?" He was almost afraid of her answer.

"Positive reinforcement, of course."

Severus swallowed.  _Bloody hell, what is_ that  _supposed to mean?_

o0o0o0o0o

Hermione knew that this next 'idea' would take every bit of her famous Gryffindor courage. She also knew it had the greatest chance of success (especially given the events of the day before).

"Can you do me a favour?" she asked, softening her voice.

"That depends," he replied.

"Can you move your comfy chair… over there?" She pointed to space she'd left deliberately empty when she had retrieved his furniture. It was directly across from the sofa and would offer him a perfect view.

"Why?"

"Because I need it there, Severus.  _Please_?"

With an exaggerated eye roll and huff, he moved to his chair and lifted it…  _by hand_. He did not Levitate it. Hermione wasn't expecting that and the display of physical strength caused a small shiver up her spine.  _Down girl! There are many miles to go yet._

Once the chair was in place, he turned to her and held up his hands expectantly.

"Have a seat and get comfortable."

He did and so did Hermione, right across from him. She removed her cardigan and tossed it to the cushion next to her, leaving her wearing only the strappy dress and shoes. They were separated by the simple, yet elegant, coffee table. It was completely empty of clutter, not even a Potions journal. She had noticed that the day before and it had made her sad. The absence of any periodicals reminded her that the once formidable wizard had truly given up.

 _Okay, Granger, you can do this!_  She leant forward. "Can I assume that you are attracted to me, Severus?"

His face didn't change; he managed to contain his surprise, that is if he felt any. After a moment he asked, "Why would you ask such a thing?"

"Two reasons, really. Yesterday you made your point quite clear…" She let her gaze drop to his crotch before looking him in the eyes once again. "... with your comment about my tits and arse. Also, because it's  _very_ important for this next part."

"First of all,  _any_ warm body would have inspired  _that_ reaction, Granger. Don't flatter yourself…"

"Why not? You did."

He scoffed. "I was just trying to frighten you."

"Fat lot of good that did," she commented.

Severus heaved a deep breath. "Now, tell me about this  _next part_."

Nothing was easy with this wizard! " _If…_  you are attracted to me, then I plan on… enticing you to utilize your shields. Tempt you, really. And offer you a reward if you succeed. You can see how I might need to know if you find me attractive. Sexually attractive, that is."

His cheeks tinged pink, just a bit, and he shifted in the chair. Several minutes passed before he finally spoke. "I do," he conceded. "Find you attractive."

"Good."  _Thank Merlin and all his little friends!_ She sat back, relaxing into the sofa.  _Here goes nothing..._  "I'm going to touch myself in front of you, Severus. I will remove my dress and touch my breasts, my nipples. Then I will touch my pussy, bringing myself to completion and you're going to watch. You will  _not_ move. You will not touch yourself at all. And, of course, you aren't allowed to touch me. I plan on making this as difficult as possible. You need to access your shields to block out your emotions and stop yourself from fulfilling your own needs. Because you  _cannot_ remove your eyes from my body whilst this is happening." She paused, giving him a pointed look and silently praising herself for getting through her speech. " _If_  you are successful - if you can erect your shields, pull them down, erect them again and pull them down once more - then you can have me. All of me. In any way you want me. It's up to you now."

o0o0o0o0o

Severus' mind screamed,  _YES! YOU FOOL! YES! YES! A THOUSAND TIMES YES!_  But thankfully, he managed to maintain a cooler outward appearance. He simply… stared at the witch on his sofa.

The man was stunned. Whatever he was expecting, it hadn't been this. Quickly schooling his thoughts, he went over the facts.

Fact number one:  _Why the everlasting fuck didn't the little chit try this 'idea' first?_

Okay, maybe that wasn't really a fact per se, but he needed to get it out of the way. Moving on…

Number two:  _This is a win-win, Snape!_ Clearly, his dick was taking control of this 'fact'.  _If you succeed, your shields work and you're whole again, plus you get to shag that hot piece over there. If it doesn't work, you have enough wank material to last the rest of your miserable days! I believe the Muggles call it a 'No-Brainer'!_

He had no idea where he'd heard that saying, but it seemed apt.

Number three:  _This could be some kind of trap, you know,_  his cynical side chimed in, deciding to make itself known.  _What if she's just trying to…_

That's where 'Cynical Snape' stopped, because what the fuck kind of trap could this be?

Number four:  _It actually makes sense, if you think about it._  Oh, yes! Bring it on 'Logical Snape'!  _Her theory is sound. Regression didn't work - wouldn't work even in a proper setting with a practiced professional - because of the existing shields and our logical mind. That would be me, just so we are all clear. We cannot be scared back into Occlumency because nothing frightens us anymore._

 _Not since catching Sprout with those African Sucking Plums after the staff party nine years ago,_ said 'Nervous Snape'.  _Do you suppose she ever got them out of there?_

 _No one asked you, you wanker!_  that was his dick again; it was getting anxious.

_**No more facts!** _

"What?!" Granger asked, looking apprehensive.

_Of course she's apprehensive, Snape! We've been sitting here, arguing with ourself… ourselves? - Oh, who the fuck cares! - for fifteen minutes. Besides that, I'm pretty sure you just screamed 'No more facts!' at her._

He didn't know who that one was and frankly didn't care. Taking a deep breath, he nodded and said, "Yes, Miss Granger. I believe we should attempt your… idea."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, tell me what you think. Are you enjoying their byplay? Will he manage to access his shields? And will Hermione get her wizard? Thanks so much for reading! ~Lil~
> 
> *I used Google Translate for the Latin here. Hope it's at least close.
> 
> **I cannot take credit for this. It's a line from a Kevin Smith film that I simply made more… 'magical' and slightly less crass. Thanks, Mr. Smith!


	3. Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, but I have never been entirely pleased with this part of the story (I'm still not!). As always huge thanks go to my wonderful betas for all their work and support. I must take full credit for any and all mistakes, however. Do not blame these lovely ladies. I've got no warnings for you in this chapter, except, well... sexy times lie ahead! I don't know what to say, this was always going to happen ; )
> 
> I have nearly finished the fourth chapter and will be posting it as soon as I can. It contains even more lemony goodness and a bit of laughter.
> 
> I own nothing. Enjoy ~Lil~

 

**Hermione Granger Visit # 4 (cont'd)**

_Thank_ _ **all**_ _the gods!_  She was starting to think she'd broken the wizard. Or he'd had a stroke. He had just sat there, unmoving, for more than a quarter of an hour. She had expected him to have to think about it, but  _mercy_! He hadn't even blinked!

Standing, she smiled and started to remove her dress. With a gentle push, the straps were over her shoulders. She reached behind her back and touched the magical closure. It released, causing the dress to pool at her feet. She wore nothing underneath.

The wizard across from her drew a sharp breath, though somehow his face remained impassive.

Hermione retook her seat. "You doing okay, Severus?" she asked.

He didn't answer, not verbally, just nodded, both of his hands resting on the arms of that incredibly plush chair of his.

"Are you comfortable?"

This time he didn't even nod, leading Hermione to believe he was already concentrating on his focus point. Perhaps he had been for some time.

 _Good_.

The intense look in his eyes, plus the fact that she was sitting bare-arse naked on his frilly-looking settee, had her quite excited already. Hermione brought her right hand slowly up her body, stroking her hip, her belly, her sternum until she found her right breast and palmed it. Pinching the nipple lightly, she allowed herself to enjoy the sensation. She also allowed a soft sigh of contentment to escape her mouth.

Her intention was to  _feel_ everything, enjoy it. Not fake it. Even if he wasn't using Legilimency - something she was certain he hadn't done (another thing to address, but not now), at least not with her, she would have known - as perceptive as he was he would have known if she was 'putting on a show'.

She was starting to moan already.  _And I'm probably about to ruin his sofa_ , she thought. She didn't want to seem  _too_ eager… just in case this didn't end as she hoped it would. Trying to school her reactions, Hermione drew a deep breath and engaged her left hand, caressing her thigh, then pinching her skin in hopes of distracting herself.

It didn't work. Frankly, the very small amount of pain just made her wetter.  _That's new!_

Bringing her left hand up to her other breast, she pinched and pulled on both nipples, letting her head fall to the back of the sofa. Gods, but she was enjoying this! It had been too long. And she had never  _just wanked_  in front of a man before. She had no idea how erotic it could be. The mere anticipation of what she was about to do had her creaming herself.

She raised her head and studied the man across from her. He was completely focused on her body. His eyes were intense, not yet blank as they would be if he was utilising his shields. She knew he could cover the 'blankness', or at least must have been able to do so in dealing with Riddle. It would have been too obvious when trying to fool the Dark wizard, but she also knew that he'd not hide it with her now. That would do neither of them any good.

It was time to turn up the heat.

Hermione ghosted the fingertips of her left hand down her torso, teasing her skin lightly, until she reached the juncture of her thighs, widening her legs as her hand moved. She then spread her lips apart, brazenly displaying herself, her wetness, for the wizard.

"Do you see how wet I am for you, Severus?" she asked, not expecting an answer. "I'm already close." And she was. She'd have to be careful to give him enough time to reach his focus point because damnit she wanted him to succeed!

She let her right hand slowly make its way to her centre. Once there, she was careful to avoid her clitoris. The hard little bud was like a bomb about to go off. Instead, she dipped a finger into her opening.  _Shit!_  She was even wetter than she had thought. The act caused a bit of moisture to trickle out; it ran down the crack of her arse. Closing her eyes, she inserted two fingers and tossed her head back as she stretched herself.  _Fuck!_  Her hips rose, meeting her hand.

Her focus was now on her own pleasure; she had completely forgotten about the man across the room. As she continued to fuck herself, feeling the moisture covering her hand, hearing the obscene squelch of her juices, she had the sudden sensation of a presence  _very_ close by.

Opening her eyes, she found Severus standing over her. His eyes dead, lifeless. He stared like that for several seconds, a minute. Hermione didn't remove her hand, but stopped fucking herself. It suddenly occurred to her that he was  _not_ following her directions. He wasn't supposed to move.

She was frozen in indecision (and overwhelming lust!).  _Gods… he's magnificent!_ Should she say something? Admonish him for his blatant misbehaviour?  _Oh, fuck it!_ He had engaged his shields and he could collect his reward early for all she cared!

His shields dropped, his eyes once again expressive. "Do not stop," he instructed. "But do not come."

At his command, she felt herself constrict around her own fingers. Hermione nodded and got back to work. She watched as Severus effortlessly slipped behind his shields once again. Gods, but it turned her on even more to know that he had accomplished his task, that he had managed, after more than two years, to find and erect his shields then pull them back down and erect them once again.

She continued to watch him carefully, waiting for him to return. Her plans were already a bit derailed; he wasn't supposed to be in charge here, she was! But he was succeeding and about to get his reward (and hopefully, so was she!). Who was she to deny him his request?

As the cloud cleared from his eyes once again, he pushed up the sleeves of his tee shirt and blindly kicked the coffee table away a couple of feet. "Done," he said as he dropped to his knees in front of her. "Now, I believe you said…  _in any way I want you_ , correct?"

Hermione slowly nodded.

He smiled. His eyes shown with a mixture of lust, menace and mischief. Reaching for her hand, that was still buried between her legs, he pulled it out. Her wet fingers glistened in the early afternoon sunlight. " _All of you…"_  He sucked her fingers into his mouth and closed his eyes in obvious delight. His tongue licked her clean, working around both digits as he hummed his enjoyment as he released her.

"You  _may_ have just made a deal with the devil, Miss Granger," he said before ducking and driving his tongue deep inside her.

o0o0o0o0o

When Severus found his shields - easily, if he were being honest - he was more than a bit shocked. They were right there where they'd always been. As they slipped into place it felt like being covered with a warm blanket of nothingness. It felt like they'd never left him. Which they hadn't, of course. Granger was right. He must have known it on some level. They'd been holding back the Darkness all these months, keeping him sane, even if he wasn't in control of them consciously. The absence of nightmares was the biggest clue, but he had refused to believe it.

His focus point had changed again - that too was a surprise - just as when he was a child it had formed on its own, without his aid whatsoever. What his mind had chosen to use to centre him was odd in the extreme, but it worked and that's all that mattered.

At this point, he decided to move closer. He could see everything more clearly whilst behind his shields, the world was sharper, sounds more distinct. Even his sense of smell was enhanced. Thank the gods!

Granger was lost in her own pleasure and he frankly wanted a better view.

He saw everything: the rise and fall of her chest, her pebbled nipples, the small beads of sweat on her forehead, her clavicle, her sternum. And oh, the sounds! She was taking quick, shallow breaths interspersed with gasps and moans. It was very nearly musical in its rhythm. A lovelier sound he could not remember hearing. Her hand was creating an erotic symphony of its own, working her juices to a crescendo. He could smell her too, of course. Her scent growing stronger the closer he got. Standing over her as she fucked herself, he knew what he wanted.

Her eyes opened, meeting his and willed his shields to drop. She should witness his victory. They dropped, disappeared without a stutter. She stopped moving.

 _Oh, we can't have that._ "Do not stop," he told her. "But do not come." That orgasm belonged to him. He was owed it.

The witch nodded, then her fingers started to move once again. He immediately focused on resurrecting his shields.

Her request was quite ingenious. Raising them once meant nothing, but to drop them and raise them again meant that he was in  _complete_ control. She was a brilliant, delectable little thing and he was about to consume her.

She was focused on his face as she continued to masturbate. He watched for a full minute before letting his shields go for the final time. Pushing his sleeves out of the way, he kicked the coffee table back and said, "Done." As he dropped to his knees between her splayed thighs, he breathed deeply. The smell of her sex was intoxicating. "Now, I believe you said…  _in any way I want you,_  correct?"

Granger nodded once again, her eyes wide and slightly apprehensive. He smirked, it probably came off a bit evil but he didn't care. He grabbed her hand out from its naughty hiding place. " _All of you,"_  he said before sucking her fingers clean. By the gods did she taste delicious! Once finished he couldn't help but making one more attempt at frightening her. "You just may have made a deal with the devil, Miss Granger." He knew she wouldn't renege; she was a Gryffindor, after all. Lowering his head, he dove in.

Her cunt tasted even better at the source. He drove his tongue deep inside her as he held her down. The witch's hips bucked up, trying to break his nose but some gentle pressure on her hips kept her firmly in place. Severus took his time, enjoying every drop, every moan, every needy cry, before trailing his tongue through her folds and finding her distended little clit. It was ripe and ready.

He pulled back, causing her to whine piteously. "Was there something that you needed, Miss Granger?" he asked in a casual voice. Regaining control of his shields had given Severus an extra strength dose of self-confidence and he was about to put it to good use.

" _Please!"_  she begged.

Slipping a single digit between her dripping lips, he said, "Please…  _what_?"

"Oh, fuck! Snape!  _Make me come!_ " she growled angrily.

"My, my, Miss Granger, you seem  _very_ out of sorts."

She leant up a couple of inches. "If you don't touch my clit in the next five seconds and make me come, you'll see just how  _out of sorts_  I can get, you selfish bastard!"

Severus chuckled. She really was an interesting little witch. Too bad she was just here in the capacity of 'Occlumency Healer'. He wouldn't mind keeping her… for a while, anyway. "Okay, Miss Granger. No need to get stroppy." She did deserve an orgasm, of course. Lowering his head once again, he worked his tongue through her pussy, lapping at her until he reached her clit.

Granger moaned as he circled the bundle of nerves with the tip of his tongue and slipped first one, then two fingers into her core. After a little exploring, Severus found the spongy inner tissue of her front wall and pressed. She grunted and bucked.  _That's it, girl, give it to me_. He sucked her clit into his mouth as he stimulated her g-spot and she dug her fingers into his hair, holding him in place, riding his mouth.

 _"That's it!_  Ahhh…  _Ooooo…_ Fuuuck!"

He didn't let up, just continued to finger fuck her through her orgasm. Her verbal praise carried on. She was just as loquacious in sex as in her everyday life, it seemed. Evidently she ' _loved his mouth, his fingers and his tongue!_ '. When her hips finally relaxed onto his now ruined divan, he pulled his hand free, kissed her clit and sat back on his heels.

The witch looked spent. And she was, no doubt. Eyes closed, chest heaving, she was simply stunning. After several minutes she opened her eyes and smiled. "Magnificent," she said in a breathy whisper. "What's next?"

 _Next? Oh, yes_. She had said whatever he wanted, or somesuch. "My bed might be more comfortable… If you're so inclined?" Why did he suddenly feel self-conscious?

Granger smiled. "I certainly am  _so inclined_." She stood. "Lead the way. But stay close, if you don't mind. My legs are a bit… wobbly."

He rose and stepped towards the hallway that led to his room, but was stopped by her hand on his elbow. "Severus?" she said.

"Yes." He turned, noticing that she was standing right next to him, almost touching.

"Could you call me Hermione?" She raised her hand, smoothing it over his chest. "Miss Granger is so…"

"Hogwarts?" he interrupted.

She giggled. "Well, yes. Not that I mind, of course. But unless we're playing 'caught out after curfew', it feels a bit formal for what we just did... and are about to do."

"'Caught out after curfew?'" he asked. "Do I even want to know?"

"I suppose that depends. But just remember, I'm a dab hand at Transfiguration. My dress can become a pleated skirt and oxford in a heartbeat." She winked, then turned and looked to her right. "Oh, is that the bathroom? I need it for just a mo, if you don't mind," she said as she dashed off.

" _Bloody hell…"_  he whispered as he opened the door to his room.

o0o0o0o0o

The tea had gone right through her. After using the loo and washing her hands, Hermione checked out her reflection.  _Shit!_  She looked half-fucked already. She giggled.  _I suppose I am_.

Looking around the neatly organised bathroom, Hermione couldn't stop herself, she opened the medicine cabinet. Nothing too exciting: toothpaste, toothbrush, a comb, a brush, shaving cream, a straight razor -  _hmm… he shaves rather than using a spell, interesting_  - and oils, lots of oils. That explained his intoxicating smell. She picked up one of the jars, opened and gave it a sniff.  _Bergamot, sandalwood and cucumber?_  It shouldn't have worked but it did.

Putting it back, she closed the mirrored cabinet and turned. She didn't want to just walk into his room naked. Her eyes fell on the back of the bathroom door. A dressing gown and a couple of white shirts hung there.

Hermione smirked as she chose a shirt, slipping it over her shoulders. It smelt of him, his oils.

Things were going exactly to plan. He had his shields back; that had been her main goal, of course. Getting closer, much closer, was just a bonus. Whether or not this could become something more, she did not know.  _A girl can dream._

She hadn't intended to seduce him, at least not at first. Visit number one had gone just as she had expected it to. He was still a git. Her desire hadn't really intensified until she had watched him handle the cursed cameo. His power was intoxicating. The discovery wasn't surprising, however, as it wasn't the first time she'd noticed him. That had happened years before. Defense classes had started becoming… interesting about halfway through the year. Oh, she wasn't the only girl who found their dark, brooding professor at least a little attractive.

Hermione always had a hard time finding wizards that could challenge her. Mentally, well, not to brag but she was simply smarter than most men she encountered. She was also incredibly powerful, which tended to intimidate a wizard usually before they even met her. She was well known, after all. Her job didn't exactly help either. On top of all that, Hermione didn't like wasting her time with mediocre sex. No, not again! Severus, if his oral display just now was any indication, would be far from mediocre.

Drawing a deep breath, Hermione opened the door.

She found him sitting on the edge of his bed, looking, well, adorable, if she was being honest. He'd removed his shoes and socks and was just wearing the dark jeans and tee shirt combo she had come to love.

Standing, he shoved his hands into his pockets. "That's my shirt."

"And here I always thought you hated it when someone stated the obvious," she said with a smirk. "I suppose you're the exception to the rule?"

He brought his hands up, crossing them over his chest and then let them fall to his sides as if he wasn't quite sure what to do with them. Oh, was he… nervous? She was gonna eat him up!

She continued to close the distance between them. Once she was less than a foot from him, she reached out, placing both hands on his chest. "Have you tried them again?" she asked.

He nodded. "Of course."

"Any problems?"

"None."

"Excellent." Smoothing her hands down his torso, she let her nails scrape at his abs as she asked, "Have you thought about what you want to do next?"

"I have a question first."

"Ask away."

"Is this pity? Or just your all-consuming need to  _save_  someone?" He took a step back, just out of her reach. "I do have a little bit of pride left, Granger."

Hermione sighed. "I don't pity you, Severus. But yes, I do want you to be… better, I suppose. All-consuming? That's a bit overstating it, don't you think?"

"You Gryffindors are so melodramatic…"

"You're one to talk with your billowing robes and 'bewitching the mind'." This wizard… he was so bloody stubborn!  _But worth it,_  she told herself. "Can you look?" she asked. "I'm willing to open my mind and let you see my intentions."

Severus stared at her for several seconds before looking away. "I'm… not sure. I haven't attempted Legilimency in… quite some time."

 _Oh, of course._  "Give it a try, Severus."

Suddenly his wand was in his hand and pointed at her temple. " _Legilimens!"_  Then he was inside her mind.

Hermione easily pushed forth every salacious thought she'd recently had about the wizard; the way she had checked out his arse the day she'd brought him the cameo; how she'd felt when he accosted her in his foyer: turned on, yes, but a little put off by his faked aggression. Then, for good measure, she shoved an image of her pleasuring herself in her bathtub to images of him fucking her.

When he retreated, he was breathing heavily but his eyes still looked wary. "You are a self-proclaimed master Occlumens, how am I to believe what I've just seen?"

She rolled her eyes. "First of all, congratulations, you've still got it. And secondly…" She brought her hand up to the bulge in his jeans, cupping him roughly. "... I suppose this comes back to trust."

Severus bucked into her hand, closing his eyes for a millisecond. " _Fuck it!"_  he mumbled, as his hands came up to clutch at her shoulders. When his eyes opened he raked them down her body. "You look positively sinful in my shirt...  _Hermione_."

Her name on his tongue was basically the last straw. With a gentle shove, she had him sprawled on the bed. Though caught off guard, he quickly recovered as Hermione followed, straddling his hips and lowering her head to his. "I want to kiss you, Severus. Then I want to strip you and taste you. Is that acceptable?"

The wizard groaned, his hips surging upwards as he gripped her head tightly, pulling her down until their lips met. Though his actions were aggressive the kiss was somehow tender, almost sweet. When he brushed her lips with his tongue, Hermione opened obligingly, allowing him in. Severus teased her, however - she knew how long that tongue was, had felt it in her quim - licking the corners of her mouth, her teeth before finally stroking her tongue, lapping at it.

She moaned and let her body relax further into his, her hands gripping his hair, tugging, pulling. Fuck, but this wizard did something to her that she simply could not explain. She had felt it before, these fleeting moments of attraction, in sixth year but had shrugged it off as teenage hormones. When she had found out about his sacrifices after the battle, she had felt an overwhelming sense of admiration and guilt, even though it was unreasonable for her to have known his true allegiance. That was the point of a spy, was it not? The trial had been excruciating. Watching his life paraded in front of the Wizengamot and the Wizarding public caused Hermione to hurt, almost physically, for the man. And when Minerva had told her of his attempt to end his life… she was angry. How dare he? How  _dare_ he deprive them of his brilliant mind, his expertise, his knowledge, his….  _Him_?

She was brought out of her musings by a sharp but enjoyable pain just under her ear. " _Are you still with me, my little saviour?"_ he whispered against her abused flesh.

"Of course," she replied as she sat up, pushing against his chest. "I want to see you, Severus." Moving her hands to the hem of his tee shirt, she nudged it up his stomach, keeping an eye on his face to see if he might object.

He did not. Instead, he sat up and tugged the garment over his head, tossing it to the floor. "There's not much to see, Granger," he said.

She was back to Granger, then?  _A defense mechanism,_  she decided. "I'll be the judge of that, thank you very much." As her hands danced up his sides she noticed a quirk of his lips.  _Is Severus Snape… ticklish? Wouldn't that be a coup?_

"Don't even think about it," he warned.

"I wouldn't dream…" She continued her journey, storing the information for another time -  _please let there be another time_  - until her hands found his flat nipples. His sharp inhalation of breath told her that he was pleased and she lowered her head, taking one of the nubs into her mouth. Severus' hands instantly found her hair, holding her close as he bucked up, his still clothed erection grazing her centre.

"Gods… Hermione…" he moaned. It very nearly sounded like a plea.

She retreated, sitting back on her heels and taking him in. He was thin, but not as thin as he once had been, she suspected. His scars were numerous, of course, but not unexpected. Besides, she had her own and he would have seen them in his sitting room earlier. Scars didn't bother Hermione, not in the least.

As she scooted back, stepping off the bed, she said, "Head on the pillows, Professor," in her bossiest tone. The one had used to make the boys finish their revision and STOP talking about Quidditch.

Severus complied, shockingly. With only a raised eyebrow, he moved to get comfortable at the head of the bed. "Now what, Miss Granger?" he asked as he rested his hands behind his head.

"As much as I enjoy them, the jeans have to go." Hermione crawled between his legs and attended to the buttons and zip, focusing her attention to her task and  _not_ the fact that in a few short seconds she'd have her most hated former professor's cock in her mouth. No. Her nerves just wouldn't allow her to concentrate on that at the moment.

Once the garment was on the floor with his shirt, she raked her hands up his lightly furred legs.  _Good,_  she thought. Some men were so… hairy. His pants were a simple pair of black boxer-briefs, unsurprisingly and were generously tented, displaying his endowment for her perusal. Peruse she did. She was drawn from her study by his voice, however.

"You don't have to do that, you know," he said.

When she looked up she found him leaning on his elbows, staring down at her. "I know; I want to," she explained. And she did, oddly enough. He hadn't requested it but she found herself salivating at the mere idea. "Just relax, Severus. Do you suppose that I often do things which I don't want to do?"

He shook his head as he let his body fall back onto the bed and Hermione took the waistband of his pants, tugging them down, not stopping until he was free of them. She then returned to his erection, now bared for her.

_Oh… my…_

She wasted no time. All traces of anxiety gone, Hermione took him in hand, feeling the weight of him. It was considerable, the largest she had personally encountered, she realised (much to her delight). Steel wrapped in silk, dripping with excitement (much like herself). She wanted him inside her, but first...

Her tongue snaked out to catch the drop of precum that glistened on the tip. Severus hissed above her, but she paid him no mind as she let her tongue travel up the length of his shaft, getting to know him a little better. Once she'd reached the top again, she took him in but just the tip, wetting it and lapping at it like a much-desired lolly.

" _Bloody fucking hell…"_  he cursed as his hips surged towards her mouth, causing Hermione to moan in triumph.

Suddenly his hands were in her hair, holding her close, pushing her down. She wasn't offended, not really. He wasn't exactly manhandling her, just… directing a bit. Pulling back, she managed to release him with a loud plop. "Okay, Severus, this is your prize. How do you want it?" she asked.

He seemed confused for a millisecond then he smiled. "Lose the shirt, Hermione," he instructed.

o0o0o0o0o

Oh, if all his decisions could be so…  _delicious_. Did he come in this wonderful little witch's mouth or her hot cunt?  _Hmmm…_ There really was no competition. The short blow job had been delightful, but he wanted nothing more than to feel her tight heat wrapped around his cock.

When he instructed her to,  _lose the shirt_ , she sat up and slowly unbuttoned his white lawn shirt, with a distinctive gleam in her eye. It was tossed to the floor with a flick of her wrist and then she was once again bared to him; her delectable little body on display.

Severus sat up, rising quickly to his knees to grip her. One hand went behind her head the other on her naked hip. "I will have you as the gods intended, witch," he said before taking her lips in a fiercely possessive kiss.

Hermione responded in kind, her fingers snaking into his hair, her nails scraping at his scalp. She nipped at his lips, sucked on his tongue and moaned as they made out like a couple of randy Puffs.

Taking advantage of her distraction, Severus pulled her even closer, twisting them and pushing her down onto the bed in one smooth move. Though shocked, Hermione did not relinquish hold of his mouth, simply squealed against his lips. Ending the kiss, Severus dragged his lips across her jaw, nipping as he went, wanting to savour every bit of her flesh until he found her fragrant throat once again. He worried the mark he had made moments before; she would have to cover it magically if she wanted to hide the proof of their tryst.

The witch moaned, her nails digging into his scarred back.  _Speaking of scars…_  She hadn't even blinked when he had bared himself to her. That had been surprising and yet in a way… not. She had her own scars; the one on her arm was particularly disturbing.  _Bella-fucking-trix,_ his mind cursed. He had heard about the Trio's escapade at Malfoy Manor, but had yet to actually see the evidence of the psychotic witch's torment of the young woman until she had removed her jumper in his sitting room. He had started searching for his shields at that moment, desperately reaching for them.

The sex trick had worked, obviously, but he wasn't sure that she couldn't have just shoved that awful word, etched into her arm, in his face and  _scared_ them into place.

He moved lower, finally finding her perky breasts. The breasts of a young witch.  _How long has it been since I've had access to tits like this?_ he wondered as he pinched one erect bud between his thumb and forefinger.  _Years… a decade?_ No matter, he thought as he closed his lips around the other tip, first gently biting then sucking it into his mouth.

Hermione sighed, moaned then whined as Severus switched sides.

"Oh, gods…" she whimpered. "Want you inside me…"

He could not argue with that. His cock was dripping on her thigh, hard as steel and starting to ache. Severus slid a hand between them and checked her readiness.  _Fuck!_  he thought as he slipped his fingers through her folds. She was even wetter than when he had eaten her. He hadn't thought it possible.

Raising up on one elbow, he asked, "Are you absolutely sure…?"

" _Severus,"_ she said, clutching his shoulders tightly. "Fuck me, please!"

He smirked as he drew the head of his cock through her wetness, coating himself liberally before pushing forward. Bloody hell, she was tight! He pulled out almost completely then thrust in.  _Halfway there, old man._  Again, he rocked back, pulling out, then pressed forward, and...

"Oh, yes, Severus!" she shouted, her nails digging into his back as the head of his cock finally managed to kiss her cervix. "Gods, that's good!"

"Fuck!" he moaned against her chest, trying to get acclimated to being inside of another person after so many years.  _Too long,_  he thought.  _It's been too damn long._

"Me too," Hermione said, her lips pressed against his shoulder. "I forgot how much I like sex!"

 _I said that out loud. Shit!_  "Well, as in everything, you are quite good at it, Granger," he said, trying to get back on the right foot. "Been studying? There are lots of books on the subject, after all." He had paused his thrusts while speaking so that he didn't sound like a winded old man in the process.

Her hands slipped down to his buttocks, gripping him tightly. "Don't be a git while you're fucking me, Severus!" She emphasised her point with a swat to his left arse cheek. "Harder!" she demanded.

Never one to let a lady down, Severus resumed his thrusts, picking up his rhythm and wrapping his arms up under her back to give himself even more traction and thoroughly enjoying the amount of contact the position afforded. Her skin was so soft, so fragrant. The witch was lovely and kind and brilliant. Why in Merlin's name was she letting him fuck her?

He continued to pound into her, wishing he could just stay inside her for eternity. It was  _much_ better than planning his own death. More physically taxing, of course, but much more pleasurable.  _Damnit!_  His lower back was starting to tingle and his balls were…

He leant up, intent on slipping his hand between them to stimulate her clit, but Hermione beat him to it, and he watched as her hand slid down her belly to her centre.

" _Close,"_  she growled, her bright amber coloured eyes shining up at him. "Oh… fucking fuck, I'm close, Severus!"

His hips surged forward at her words, faster and faster as he felt her starting to flutter and constrict around his cock. She had felt wonderful at the first thrust but as her walls closed in on him he was certain he had  _never_ felt such exquisite pleasure in his miserable life.

Bright white light flashed as he mind blanked out and he emptied himself into the vocal witch beneath him. She held him tightly - something which he was quite grateful; he wasn't sure that he could keep himself tethered to Earth without her strong arms holding him so close - as she shouted her completion. She did not let go, however, even after her responses quieted down.

"Shhh… I've got you," he heard her saying, but had no idea why she was soothing him. It made no sense. He was floating; still experiencing the otherworldly high of his orgasm. He felt fantastic! He didn't need coddling, for Merlin's sake!

He tried to move, his weight must have been too much for her smaller frame, but she wouldn't allow it. She continued to hold him tightly and she also continued her comforting words. "I'm right here. I'm not leaving you. I promise," she whispered, her words interspersed with gentle kisses to his damp cheek, his forehead, his eyes.

 _What is she talking about?_  he wondered as his head dropped to her shoulder. "I'm hurting you," he protested.

"You'd never hurt me, Severus," she said as she wiped the moisture off of his cheek. "But we can move if you'd be more comfortable."

Gods… he was even sweatier than he had imagined. His cheeks were wet… so wet…  _Oh, who cares._ He felt her turning them until he was sprawled, half on her, half on the bed. His head nestled against her naked breast. He was so tired, he just wanted to sleep. Just for a bit…

o0o0o0o0o

Hermione lay, Severus sleeping across her chest, carding her fingers through his damp hair. The man deserved it. He'd not only given her some of the best orgasms of her life, but he'd clearly had some kind of emotional breakdown. She wasn't sure exactly how to feel about reducing a wizard to tears with sex.

_Is that good, or bad?_

Well, he had gone through a hell of a lot that afternoon. Perhaps it was a combination of everything. Not just the sex.

_I certainly hope it wasn't the sex!_

Holding up her hand, she silently called for her wand. As soon as it hit her palm she flicked her wrist and the pair of them were covered with a light blanket. The perspiration was cooling her quickly and she knew she'd be freezing in no time. Well, except for the parts of her that was covered by the exhausted wizard. That would be quite a bit warmer.

She sighed and closed her eyes, contenting herself with a nap. Her eyes snapped open when she suddenly remembered Purdy.  _Oops_. How had she forgotten her darling owl? She waved her wand at the window on the far wall, opening it, then laid the piece of wood on the bedside table and snuggled against Severus. Yes, a short kip would be nice before he woke and realised just how much of himself he had exposed to his former pupil.

Because then all hell was going to break loose.

**Minerva McGonagall & Kingsley Shackalbolt**

She woke up just before dusk. Looking around the room, Hermione found Prudence perched on the back of the chair that sat at the writing desk under the opened window. Severus must have gotten warm; he had rolled away and he was facing the other direction, his back touching her side.

Standing, she stretched then grabbed his shirt and motioned for her owl to follow her out of the room. Of course, being a smart little thing, Purdy quietly flew from the chair to Hermione's shoulder. Once in the hallway, the bird took off through the house and the witch stopped off in the bathroom.

Hermione quickly used the facilities and cleaned up before heading back out into the hall. Her stomach growled as she passed through the sitting room.  _Food,_ she thought.  _He must have something to nibble on around here_. And indeed he did. She found cheese, crusty bread and a plethora of fruit. After making a plate (and a pot of tea), she went back to the sitting room, Prudence following in her wake.

The pair were just finishing up their little feast when the knock came, scaring them both. Prudy screeched; Hermione squeaked and suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, Severus was standing in the doorway of the sitting room.

"Of course! I should have known!" he growled before surging forward towards the small foyer.

Hermione followed, curious about what it was he 'knew'. That's when she noticed that he was only wearing his jeans and nothing else.  _Yum!_

He jerked the door opened with almost a feral look of anger in his eyes. "Come to collect your fixer, then?" he said to the confused looking witch and wizard on his doorstep.

"Severus!" Minerva said, averting her eyes (but not until after getting an eyeful, Hermione noted). "Why, in the name of all things magical, are you answering your door half naked?!"

Hermione was still standing back and to the side; the Headmistress had yet to notice her.

"Because I just finished debauching Miss Granger, of course. As if you didn't know!" Severus said with a sneer.

"What are you talking about, Severus?" Kingsley asked.

"With all due respect, Minister, sod off!" the angry wizard said before turning and storming into the sitting room. He stopped halfway between Hermione and the front door, hands on his hips as he fumed.

The pair followed, shutting the door behind them, and finally saw Hermione.

"Hello," she said with a little wave of her hand, suddenly remembering her state of dress. "Nice to see you two." She tried to ignore the heat in her cheeks as she smiled at the pair.

"Her-mi-o-ne…" Minerva said, her wide eyes taking in the younger witch toe to head. "Ah, are we… interrupting?"

Kingsley smiled rakishly and said, "Clearly we are, Minnie," with a chuckle.

She'd been distracted with her mentor and the Minister for BLOODY Magic and had failed to notice that Severus had turned around during their greeting. "Are you fucking kidding me?" He moved to stand next to the scantily clad witch. "You actually expect me to believe that you knew nothing about this?"

Minerva drew up, her lips thinning, as she glared disapprovingly at her former co-worker. Her laugh, however, betrayed her. "You think that we are aware of all of your…  _doings_ , Severus?" She turned to Kingsley, then smacked him on the shoulder. "Stop gawking at Miss Granger's legs,  _Minister_!"

Despite his anger, Severus stepped in front of Hermione, shielding her from Kingsley's wandering eyes. "No, Minerva, I think that you  _sent_ her!" he said, folding his arms over his chest.

"Hey!" she tried to interject, but was thwarted by the recent arrivals…

"We did no such thing!" Minerva protested.

"... didn't even know she was here!" Kingsley argued.

Severus held up his hand, but it didn't work, both Minerva and Kingsley continued to proclaim their innocence, which was, of course, true. Hermione hadn't told them of her plan. Like she could tell her prim former Head of House that she was going to  _seduce_ Severus' shields back into place. Sure! That would happen right after she told Molly Weasley that her brisket was a bit on the dry side (and always too salty)!

" **I don't want to hear it!"** Severus shouted, bringing an end to the bickering. He turned to Hermione. "I almost trusted you, you know." His tone was softer, almost… hurt.

"They didn't know," she said, reaching for him, but he stepped away. "You're…" She drew a deep breath. "You are  _this_ angry because they just showed up?" Even for him, this didn't make a lot of sense.

"The timing is a little suspect, Miss Granger, don't you think?"

"Severus, you have to believe me…"

"Prove it," he demanded.

"How?" Hermione asked. "How can I  _possibly_  prove this to you?" It suddenly occurred to her that this was about far more than the appearance of their friends. This was about…  _everything_. He had been so vulnerable, so open to her for hours and hours.  _His shields are definitely up now… More like walls!_

At that moment Prudy hopped from the sofa to the comfy chair then onto Severus' shoulder. "Ouch! Damnit!" He wasn't wearing a shirt and her little claws must have hurt like the devil. Gently, so much gentler than she would have imagined in the circumstances, he reached up and nudged the bird onto his hand. "What's your problem?" he growled in the owl's direction.

Prudy hooted, cocking her head first to one side then the other.

"I'm not giving you a damn biscuit right now, Prudy!" he said, then looked at Hermione. "Why is she here?"

"I told her to come…" She looked down, feeling absolutely ridiculous now that she was standing - in Severus' shirt, no less - in front of the Headmistress of Hogwarts, the Minister for Magic and an angry Severus Snape.

"Why?"

"Because…" Her voice failed. She couldn't - wouldn't. Shaking her head, she turned and, as ladylike as she possibly could, grabbed her dress and cardigan. "This was a mistake. I'm sorry. Just let me change and I'll leave. Prudy and I… we'll leave." Then she dashed into the bathroom.

o0o0o0o0o

When he had woken up and realised that he had spilled not only his seed but actual  _tears_  at the moment of his sexual release, he'd been devastated, humiliated. After a few minutes of self-recrimination, he'd gotten up to face the consequences of his actions -  _some Slytherin he'd turned out to be_ \- only to find the meddling duo at his doorstep. Of course they'd set it all up. Why else would a beautiful young witch so willingly throw herself at him in such a manner?

But she did seem sincere when she had begged him to believe her… didn't she?

Severus watch the witch's retreat with a sinking heart.  _Was she telling the truth? Impossible!_ This was all some sort of… of set up by his so-called friends! It was just the sort of thing they'd do. They had stopped him every chance they got. Checking on his brewing. Sending Aurors to follow him.  _They_ were the cause of his continued existence. All he wanted was to… to… He should be dead, damnit!

That's what he wanted, wasn't it?

Not according to his fucking Boggart.

Why had Miss Granger -  _Hermione, you called her Hermione while you were making love to her -_ why had the witch made him look at himself so closely? Why had she…?

"Severus?" Kingsley said.

He didn't turn to face the other wizard. "What?"

"It wasn't us, mate. We didn't know -  _don't_ know why Hermione's here." There was a pause. "How long?"

" _What?"_  Severus asked again.

"You had her owl a while back when you sent me that nasty letter. Has this been going on…?"

"Nothing's going on, I assure you," Severus said, his eyes still fixed on the point where she had disappeared from view.

"It doesn't appear as if it's… nothing," Minerva said. "I told you once, my boy, that woman cares for you. And you left her all of your books. I have tried to figure that out more often than I care to admit." He felt her hand on his shoulder. "Severus, why did you will Hermione your library?"

He knew, of course, he'd always known. His lie to the girl had been a convincing one, or so he thought, but it was a lie nevertheless. "Because… Because I care about them, my books. She… I knew she'd take care of them. She's… she is a good person. Kind. Generous. Caring."

"That she is," Minerva said, with a squeeze, she let go of his shoulder. "And would a good person lie to you about something so important?"

"She would not," he heard himself saying and felt his body moving toward the hallway. "See yourselves out, please."

He barely registered the front door closing as he had started the process of raising his shields. It wasn't necessary at the moment, but it was reassuring. His focus point, if nothing else brought him comfort. As the witch was taking her time, he took a moment to bask in the serenity his mind had provided. It was, oddly enough, the back garden of his cottage. Though it didn't resemble the garden as it currently looked. No, it was in full bloom, covered in plants both magical and Muggle. His point of view was from the small porch and he could see a curly headed witch tending to the plants. She rose, shaded her eyes from the bright sunlight and waved, a brilliant smile on her lips.

 _Serenity indeed,_  he thought as he released them and returned his focus to the matter at hand. Standing in front of the bathroom, he waited. Maybe a minute later the door opened.

"You're a good person," he said in place of a greeting, startling her.

"Oh, um… thank you?" She had clearly been crying: her eyes were bloodshot and her nose red. He wondered if that was why she had lingered. Was she waiting until the tears had stopped?

"You would not lie to me, would you?"

She shook her head.

"Why is Prudy here, Hermione?"

"Well, ah..." Her head dropped, her eyes falling on the rug beneath them.

Severus put his finger under her chin, pulling her face up. When their eyes met once again he said, "Please."

She huffed, an endearing little sound before speaking. "Fine. I had… hoped that we'd be staying - I'd be staying and I didn't want her to be alone… at my flat. She can hunt, of course, but she does better with me."

He stepped forward, moving his hand to cup her cheek. "It seems, perhaps, that she and I have something in common."

Hermione smiled, but there was a question in her eyes. "Have what in common?"

"I do better with you as well," he explained.

" _Oh…"_

"Will you stay, Hermione? You and Prudence? I understand that you have an extended holiday and I'm sure we can find  _many_ pleasurable things to fill up three weeks of your time," he said, moving slowly towards her. Once he had her backed up against the closed door, he lowered his head, kissing the obvious love bite on her neck. "It is summer, you know. The castle is devoid of students. Perhaps we could revisit that 'caught out after curfew' idea you had earlier…"

The witch's breathy laughter sounded like a resounding 'yes' to Severus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I said, one more to go! Hope you liked this smut-filled chapter. Please let me know. Thanks so much for reading. ~Lil~


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